On My Way - Chapter 32

Chapter 32 - Things That Disappoint Never Fail Me

I spent a long time on a green-skinned train heading back to the company to report on my work.

When I came, there was an endless stretch of fresh green outside the window; on the way back, the autumn wind howled, and everything in sight looked desolate.

Furthermore, there were three of us when I arrived, but only I remained for the return trip.

Hai Lan had resigned to take the civil service exam; Tyrannosaurus had kept his life, but his lower leg had been amputated—he would be a disabled man forever.

And this trip back to the company meant I had to fight hard to secure the maximum compensation for him.

The transport fleet had caused the bridge to collapse, making the news as a major public safety incident. The client was extremely dissatisfied and even proposed terminating our contract.

The company was still trying to mediate, but the worst-case scenario was contract termination, on top of losing the payment for the previous phase of construction.

Even at a time like this, Zhao Yu remained stuck at the site, refusing to stop work. I was the only one here to absorb the company’s thunderous rage.

"Forced progress, wage arrears, substandard quality... I’m asking you, Director Ren! How did you manage to get so many problems!"

"It’s just that the local situation is relatively complex..."

"And why was there such a massive loss of personnel? If this project continues, who is going to do it? Are you, Ren Dongxue, going to do it yourself?"

"The hiring process has been ongoing..."

Several senior executives suppressed their anger as they asked a few questions, then began slamming the table. I stood there, meek and submissive, like a dog ready to be kicked in the heart at any moment.

Only Old Feng sat there, looking at the materials without saying a word.

After two hours of torrential abuse, I was exhausted. I forced a smile to send everyone out of the conference room and then sat in my chair, numb.

One person didn't leave: Old Feng.

I didn't look up, only saying, "I'm sorry, Master. I’ve let you down."

When I was in Africa, I would jokingly call him Master, but since returning to China, I had called him that less and less.

Old Feng stood there for a moment, then said, "What is the situation exactly?"

I whispered, "Just what was mentioned earlier."

"Look at me!"

Old Feng looked into my eyes and asked, word by word, "I am asking you, what is the situation exactly."

——

In truth, the primary responsibility for this incident lay with Weisheng Transport.

It was their overloading and taking shortcuts that crushed that bridge, indirectly killing Qinglong.

Yet, everyone’s hatred was directed solely at us.

The reason was simple: on the night of the accident, that spineless manager from Weisheng went missing.

The insurance for the damaged vehicles, Qinglong’s compensation, the aftermath of the fleet—every single messy disaster landed on us.

"It’s too much of a coincidence; it’s not a coincidence at all," I muttered.

The smile of that young master from Beicang Transport replayed in my mind like mental pollution.

If it wasn't a coincidence, it was truly terrifying.

It was Beicang Transport colluding with the Weisheng manager, intentionally overloading, sending three trucks at once, and crushing that bridge...

Just for a trivial matter, a petty, insignificant grudge.

They didn't just kill one person.

It was one life lost, and three people seriously injured.

A living, breathing human being—a twenty-year-old kid who could ride horses, drive cars, smile triumphantly, and was saving money to marry the girl he loved.

In an instant, he turned into pale bones at the bottom of a river.

I was shaking uncontrollably as I spoke.

Old Feng frowned, though he wasn't affected by my emotional collapse.

He simply said calmly, "It seems that even if the contract for Jiaolong Village is saved, Zhao Yu is no longer suitable to stay there."

I looked up with trembling eyes, staring at him in disbelief.

"The situation in Jiaolong Village is complex, and Zhao Yu is too reckless. This is for his own good." Old Feng looked down at me, his eyes filled with either pity or mockery. "What you should be thinking about now is whether or not you want to stay."

——

When I left, Zhao Yu had also asked me, "Dongxue, will you come back?"

He didn't look up when he asked that; his hand, holding the pen to sign documents, was trembling slightly.

He was bold, upright, and capable; he had once been the "wise leader" in my eyes, even replacing Old Feng as my life mentor.

But now, no matter how righteous we were to outsiders, he and I both knew the truth.

If he hadn't locked horns with the Beicang transport fleet, the fleet incident wouldn't have happened.

If not for his high-pressure policies and unrestrained rushing of the schedule, there wouldn't have been a massive wave of resignations.

In fact, he was gambling. If he could force everyone to complete the project before it collapsed, he would have created another miracle, adding a spectacular chapter to his record.

But he lost the bet, and the price was a human life.

"Director Zhao, I will follow the company's arrangements," I told him.

In truth, I really didn't want to go back.

I didn't want to face the hateful gazes of the villagers, especially Harina.

I also didn't want to face these overly complex situations—these were things that couldn't be solved by "hard work" or "emotional intelligence."

Until the Weisheng manager was caught, no one knew if this was an accident or deliberate.

If it really was the work of Beicang Transport, who would be the next victim? Would it be a fellow worker, Zhao Yu... or me?

After going back, I could pick up that school renovation project.

I could still do many, many projects.

Someday I would wait for a new opportunity.

But if life is gone, it is truly gone.

——

I looked at Old Feng, but ultimately couldn't open my mouth.

Even though I had ten thousand reasons to give up.

However, there was always a voice in my ear saying: Ren Dongxue, you cannot be a deserter!

If I run away this time, what about next time?

Am I supposed to pray that every construction site I visit goes smoothly without a hitch?

Old Feng said, "Zhao Yu isn't a fool. Do you know why he was rushing so fast?"

I hesitated.

"Because he knew that this place is remote and the people are complicated. The longer we stay, the more dangerous it becomes," he said. "But it still wasn't fast enough."

After he finished speaking, he stood up to leave, leaving behind one sentence: "Abandon this project. I will help you transfer."

I sat alone in the conference room, dazed for a long time.

Outside the window, the rain poured down in torrents.

——

I went home.

I knew that in my current state, I was not fit to think, let alone make a decision.

I should take a hot shower, then get some serious sleep, and forget all the fatigue, pain, and confusion.

Grandma didn't know I was back, so I unlocked the door myself.

I saw them—a whole family.

My younger brother was lying on my sofa watching TV, my stepmother was wearing my clothes, busy serving dishes, and my father was sitting in my magnolia-patterned chair, picking his feet while on the phone. When he saw me come in, he froze.

Grandma scrambled out from the back room in a panic: "Dongxue, you’re back... hey, why didn't you give us a heads-up?"

"Why do you need a heads-up to return to your own home!" my stepmother chided with exaggerated playfulness. "Come eat, come eat! I just bought a braised fish."

When she saw me staring at her, she uncomfortably pulled at the corner of her clothes and said, "I didn't bring enough clothes to change, so I'm wearing yours for now."

Grandma grabbed my hand, explaining in a fluster: "I couldn't get along with that babysitter... Xiaowei came looking for work, and I thought, since I'm living alone anyway, it’s... it’s... better to have family here..."

Xiaowei—speaking of Xiaowei, ever since I walked in, he had been lying on my sofa as if it were his right, not even glancing at me once.

I pulled my hand away and said quietly, "So, I’m killing myself working to earn money just to support their family... is that it?"

"They won't stay! They'll leave when you’re back!" Grandma was so anxious her words were stumbling: "Don't be angry, please don't be angry!"

My father couldn't sit still anymore. He slammed the table and stood up: "How are you talking to your grandmother! I am your father! I raised you! What’s wrong with staying in your house for two days! Even if I wanted you to sell the house, it would be my right!"

I chuckled lightly and said, "You’re still the same. Whenever you’re guilty, you start yelling, as if having a loud voice makes you right."

"I was raised by Grandma, with living expenses provided by Mom... When you and this woman were dating, she insisted I stole her things, and you kicked me down the stairs. Based on that..." I kicked the table over; soup and dishes spilled across the floor, and my stepmother shrieked.

Even the young master on the sofa finally moved his gaze away from the TV, watching me in a stupor.

I remained calm, speaking slowly and deliberately: "Based on that, none of you have the right to eat in my home."

I looked at my father. He wanted to put on an angry face, but perhaps my current appearance was too terrifying, resembling too much the "high-ranking officials" he had feared his whole life.

He shrank back, awkwardly avoiding my gaze.

"I thought we had an unspoken understanding, so I kept giving you face. But if you don't want face, then there's no choice." I looked each of them in the eyes and said, word by word: "Leave my house before I return tomorrow. I’ll treat it as if nothing happened. Otherwise, I will not give you another penny."

My brother went from shocked to furious, shouting defiantly: "What are you doing! We aren't leaving! Let’s see what you can actually do to us!"

"Honey, you don't want to see what I’m capable of." I even managed a smile: "I work on construction sites."

Grandma was already crying and pulling at me. I slowly took her hand down and said, "I’m not giving them a chance; I’m giving you a chance, old woman. If they are still here tomorrow, I will hire people to kick you out along with them."

After I finished, I left.

In truth, I could have called the police and had the whole group cleared out tonight.

But I was too exhausted. I was too tired to argue, and I didn't even have the energy to continue living in this place.

How absurd. They had turned this into their home, and the whole room was filled with the scent of their family, reminding me of every time I had to reach out for money as a child—that feeling of being on pins and needles, that embarrassment and suffering.

I don't blame Grandma. She is just a stingy, shallow, and vain old woman.

I am just sad that in this world, there is not a single person I can truly entrust with my heart and trust completely.

————

I walked in the autumn rain for a long time, until my bangs were soaked through, with water slowly trickling down.

I arrived at Cheng Xia’s door.

I hadn't told him I was back. Without that morbid obsession of his, our daily chats were dull and hollow: Good morning, good night, have you eaten?

But now, I wanted to see him so, so much. Just like walking for too long in the darkness, I was desperate to see the moon to find my way.

I pressed the doorbell. I pressed it for a long time before I heard footsteps.

It was Cheng Xia. He opened the door, and the warm, watery light spilled out, illuminating a corner of the dark hallway.

"Dongxue?" He looked at me, astonished, and said, "Why did you come?"

I noticed he was wearing a crisp blue shirt, not loungewear, and he had asked, why did you come?

So I smiled, thinking it was all so funny.

I said, "Is there someone inside? If there is, I won't disturb you.”