Against the Current - Chapter 340

Chapter 340 - Father and Son (Part 2)

Madam Qin was already dumbfounded. Tears streaming down her face, she stepped forward and clutched Lin Changzheng's arm, pleading, "My lord, please take care of your health. We are all family here with no outsiders present; let's talk things over calmly and not let anger harm your constitution." Lin Changzheng gasped for breath, his chest heaving violently. He had always respected Madam Qin and even held a twinge of fear toward his wife, but at this moment he could no longer care. He shoved her aside, shouting, "Have you lost your mind as well, that you are actually indulging him in this?"

Lin Jinlou's eyes were bloodshot, and he unconsciously took half a step back. Every single one of these words struck like a hammer upon his heart, filling him with a towering rage and a feeling as though his heart were being roasted in oil. Yet this was his own father, leaving him utterly helpless—much like a general about to suffer defeat on the battlefield, facing tens of thousands of troops but unable to issue commands. Taking a step forward to stand right before Lin Changzheng, he ground his teeth and said, "She didn't cling desperately and insist on staying in our household—it was I who clung desperately and refused to let her leave!"

With a sharp crack, Lin Changzheng delivered a slap across Lin Jinlou's face, trembling all over with fury. "Rebellion! This is sheer rebellion! Get down on your knees!" Staggering backward, he slumped onto the platform bed. Madam Qin hurried over to soothe his breathing, while Lin Jinlou, left with no alternative, braced himself and dropped to his knees.

Trembling with his finger pointed outward, Lin Changzheng spat, "Has your mind been befuddled by illness that you are willing to renounce all family ties? Enough, enough—that maidservant already has a murky, unblemished past after being stranded in Yangzhou once. Leaving aside the fact that she is not a bondmaid, even if she hailed from a respectable family, such a stained reputation makes her entirely unworthy!"

Lin Jinlou's undergarments were already soaked through with cold sweat. He felt as though he could hardly breathe, his heart pierced by a thousand needles. Closing his eyes, he felt the veins on his forehead throbbing with a blinding headache. His throat dry and hoarse, he rasped, "In what way is she unworthy? Why was she stranded in Yangzhou? Wasn't it to save Mother and my younger sister? Later on, she even saved your son! Based on that alone, she is worthy of anything!"

Fuming with rage, Lin Changzheng retorted, "Gratitude is repaid as gratitude, but how can you conflate the two and bring shame upon the ancestors of the Lin family? I hear she once spent time at the Song residence and has a past history with the Song boy—scheming, manipulative, and single-mindedly trying to climb up high. Such profound cunning and scheming methods! A person of lowly birth, yet harboring such wild delusions!"

Unable to suppress the fire in his heart any longer, Lin Jinlou panted heavily and grated through his teeth, "So it turns out the ancestors of the Lin family never understood how to repay kindness with gratitude, proving themselves inferior even to a woman. Let me say it again: she is not lowly. Even if she truly were a bondmaid, she is not lowly!"

In his fury, Lin Changzheng leaped straight to his feet, lunged forward to grab Lin Jinlou by the lapels, and lashed out in a stern voice, "You unrepentant wretch! You are determined to drive me to my grave today, aren't you? If you persist in this willful obstinacy, do not blame me for showing no mercy in cutting off this future calamity!"

Lin Jinlou gave a sharp start, locking his eyes onto Lin Changzheng's gaze. His eyes grew increasingly fierce as he softly asked, "What does Father intend to do?"

Lin Changzheng sneered, "I raised an unfilial wretch like you who cares nothing for the prestige and future of the Lin family, but I cannot indulge your madness! That young woman rendered service to the Lin family, which should have been a touching tale of repaying kindness with a lifetime of glory and wealth. If she fails to know her place, however, do not force me to change the color of that tale."

Gazing straight at Lin Changzheng with a face cloaked in frost, Lin Jinlou gave a slight nod and said, "Very well, very well, very well. Should anyone dare to lay a single finger on her..."

Lin Changzheng coldly replied, "And if I do touch her? Will you commit parricide and matricide? Then I shall simply consider that I never had a son like you!"

Stepping forward, Madam Qin grabbed both of their arms and wept, "You are a proper father and son—how has it come to this? Whatever matters a family has can be discussed peacefully. If the two of you completely sever ties, won't that be the death of me?" With that, she could no longer hold back her tears and began to sob.

With a pale face, Lin Jinlou stared fixedly at Lin Changzheng and slowly said, "Son would never dare. But I leave these words here today: I will not marry her only over my dead body! Even if she dies and turns to ashes, I will still marry her spirit tablet and live out my days with it."

Stunned, Madam Qin gasped aloud, "Lou'er! What kind of nonsense are you uttering!"

Trembling all over with rage, Lin Changzheng nodded repeatedly and said, "Fine, fine. I will remember these words of yours and see just how you manage it. You unfilial beast, daring to stand up to me—since you dare to do it, I dare to cast you out of this household! Get out! Get out of my sight!"

Lin Jinlou stood up and retreated a few steps, stumbling unsteadily. His complexion was ashen, his entire head slick with sweat, feeling much like a man heavily intoxicated. In a daze, he turned and walked out. Though Madam Qin called out his name in a tearful, lowered voice, he heard none of it, his ears filled with a roaring sound.

Inside the room, Lin Changzheng sank heavily into his seat, then slumped against the head of the platform bed, feeling as though his entire body had fallen apart. Lin Jinlou had possessed an overbearing, tyrannical temperament since childhood; as a father, he had never been able to completely subdue him, and the boy had even loved to spar and make trouble with him. Yet, he had always known where to draw the line, understood the importance of advancing himself, and would brush off reprimands with a cheeky grin. This was the first time he had ever laid eyes on his eldest son in such a state. Standing before him, taller and sturdier than himself, enveloped in a chilling aura and radiating his own authority, Lin Changzheng suddenly realized in a flash of insight that this son was truly a decisive military commander capable of holding his own and daring to contend with him head-on. He realized he could no longer control him at all.

When Lin Jinlou returned to Changchun Hall, Xiaojuan, Huashan, Lingqing, and Lingsu were kicking a shuttlecock in the courtyard. Catching sight of Lin Jinlou entering the courtyard and taking in his disheveled robes and wretched appearance, they exchanged glances in dismay, bit their fingers in apprehension, and quietly slipped away in a flurry. Ignoring them entirely, Lin Jinlou stared straight ahead and walked back to his rooms. Hongjian and Lielan had not yet left; following Lin Jinlou's instructions, they were staying by Xianglan's side and chatting with her, while Xueying bustled about arranging tea and fruit nearby. As Lin Jinlou entered, the four of them stood up. Seeing the swollen, red palm print stamped across his face, they were all startled and dared not speak further, hurriedly taking their leave. Xueying glanced thoughtfully between Lin Jinlou and Xianglan, then closed the door behind her as she left.

Lin Jinlou paced back and forth inside the room like a trapped beast, consumed by an unbearable restlessness. Dragging over the leather sandbag used for practicing punches, he began hammering it furiously, blow after blow, until his hands turned raw and red and his knuckles swelled up. Beads of sweat rolled down his face, and every inhalation left his lungs burning and dry. He beat at the bag until his body was nearly exhausted and drained of every ounce of strength, then staggered and collapsed onto the floor. After a long while, he crawled back up, seated himself on the floor with his back against the wall, and fixed a blank, dazed stare upon the blue sky outside the window, turning as motionless as a stone statue.

Xianglan watched him in silence the entire time. She had never seen Lin Jinlou in such a state, and an unspeakable ache filled her heart. She started to stand up, hesitating after a couple of steps, when she saw Lin Jinlou suddenly turn his head. Standing against the light so that his facial expression was obscured, he murmured, "I thought you'd come over to look at me." After gazing at Xianglan for a long moment, he turned his head away again.

Choking back her emotions with a heavy heart, Xianglan walked over softly, crouched down, and, unable to help herself, reached out to lightly touch Lin Jinlou's face, whispering, "There is some ointment in the drawer; let me apply some for you." The moment her fingers brushed against Lin Jinlou's face, she caught herself and tried to pull back, but Lin Jinlou grabbed her hand, his dark eyes fixing a heavy, profound gaze upon her.

The two stared at each other in silence for a moment. As Xianglan looked deep into Lin Jinlou's eyes, a sudden flutter of panic seized her. Lowering her gaze, she noticed Lin Jinlou's hands—red and swollen, with bruised knuckles. Her voice abruptly dropped to a whisper: "Why put yourself through this? You... I'll go get the ointment for you." With that, she withdrew her hand, stood up, and wiped the corners of her eyes with her handkerchief as she turned away.

Before long, Xianglan returned with the ointment, gently applying it first to Lin Jinlou's face and then to his hands. Lin Jinlou allowed her to tend to him without a word, his gaze vacant as he stared straight out the window. Xianglan poured a bowl of tea, handed it over, and said, "Have a sip."

Suddenly, Lin Jinlou grabbed Xianglan's wrist and pulled her into his arms. With a startled gasp, Xianglan dropped the entire bowl of tea onto the floor as Lin Jinlou held her tightly against his chest, burying his face in the crook of her neck to take a deep breath. When Xianglan raised her arms to wrap them around him, he trembled, and the profound stiffness in his body finally began to melt away.

Xianglan asked softly, "What has gotten into you?"

Lin Jinlou remained silent. After a long pause, he murmured, "Xianglan, do you hate me?"

Xianglan froze. Did she hate him? In her eyes, Lin Jinlou had originally been an overbearing tyrant, a demon—fierce, domineering, shrewd, discerning, brimming with unyielding pride—who continually forced her, pressing her down into the mud with one hand while repeatedly saving her with the other. Yet she could no longer remember clearly. She was not yet old, but those past events had all faded away like wisps of smoke. Perhaps she was simply someone destined to suffer without holding grudges; the cruelty he had once shown her had gradually blurred into dust, but the kindness he had shown her remained firmly etched in her heart, especially that snowy night when, gravely wounded and down to his last breath, he had entrusted Yuan Shaoren to look after her in the future.

Before she could answer, she heard Lin Jinlou let out a dry, self-deprecating scoff. "You hate and despise me, don't you? Right?" Xianglan struggled upward with all her might, cupped Lin Jinlou's face in both hands, looked straight into his eyes, and shook her head with utmost earnestness. "I don't hate you. I stopped hating you a long time ago."

"Indeed, you have a soft heart and never truly hated anyone."

"..."

"Then... do you love me?"

"..." Staring at Lin Jinlou with her deep, pool-like eyes, Xianglan felt her heart leap wildly. Her throat suddenly tightening, she asked in a low voice, "Why is the Master asking this?"

"I just wanted to know. I... I... never mind." Turning his gaze away from Xianglan, he continued to hold her very close, murmuring after a long silence, "It's nothing... It's enough that I love you."

Tighter constricted her heart, a swirling mixture of emotions threatening to burst it wide open. Her entire body trembled slightly, her eyes shimmering with moisture. She rested her face against Lin Jinlou's shoulder, concealing the tears streaming down her face.

After a moment, Lin Jinlou softly said, "Did my father make you suffer grievances today? Don't take it to heart; that old man is simply someone who finds fault with everything. Just show him respect and treat whatever he says as if he were singing a little tune... He's likely staying in the capital this time; the Second Prince's rebellion has implicated many court officials, leaving the imperial court severely wounded and depleted. The old man has an outstanding administrative record, so he will likely enter the Grand Secretariat. His staying in the capital is a good thing... I've long wanted to present a grand gift to you so that you won't suffer any more grievances in the future, but it's been delayed in coming together. Once it's settled, we'll return to Jinling to live our own carefree life, and we won't need to look at anyone's expression."

Wiping her face quietly with her handkerchief, Xianglan looked at him and asked, "What grand gift?"

Lin Jinlou patted her shoulder and finally said, "I'll tell you when it's settled. I wonder if it's something you'll even care for... Leaving that aside, once we return to Jinling, I'll accompany you to visit your family. It's been a while since you last saw your parents; you must miss them terribly, don't you?"

Xianglan did not speak. As she listened to Lin Jinlou's rambling words, her thoughts remained fixed on that "grand gift." Being a clever person, she had put the pieces together over these past few days as Lin Jinlou busied himself—first having someone commission the biography The Lay Scholar of Orchid Fragrance, then having her paint for Lin Zhaoxiang, taking her to meet his parents, and now returning with this demeanor. She could guess his intentions with about nine-tenths accuracy. Wrapping her arms around Lin Jinlou's face, she pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. Feeling as though the heavens had cracked open and his entire field of vision were spinning in dizziness, Lin Jinlou rasped out hoarsely, "Xianglan..." and sealed her lips with a kiss.