Love in Red Dust - Chapter 77

Chapter 77

What a self-absorbed man! Dingyi struggled hard. "No wonder people are always beating you up, you deserve it! Let go right now, or I'm not going to be polite anymore."

The Seventh Prince said, "Are you not sad? I know you're hurting inside, I'm just trying to comfort you."

She was so angry she stomped her foot. "I don't need your comfort, I have my Twelfth Prince! Are you afraid I don't have enough trouble already, so you have to stir the pot twice?"

The Seventh Prince had intended to persist a little longer, but he caught sight of someone walking down the alley, hands clenched at his abdomen, every step heavy with the gathering force of a storm. Terrified, he let go and stepped back a large pace. "Twelfth Brother, a gentleman uses his words, not his fists."

"You still know what a gentleman is?" Hongce gritted his teeth with a grim smile. "You're a gentleman, and you’re hugging my woman?"

"I mistook her for someone else." The Seventh Prince was practically blurting out whatever came to mind. "I mistakenly took her for my Mongolian bride. It was a momentary lapse; the crime doesn't merit death."

Dingyi wanted to laugh at the Seventh Prince's behavior, but she couldn't. There was a heavy weight on her heart that made it hard to breathe. She tugged on Hongce’s sleeve. "The Seventh Prince was kind enough to come and rescue me; otherwise, I would have been swallowed whole by now."

Hongce knit his brows. "I know everything. This was a clever trick thought up by Hongzan. He brought Mu Liansheng out with the sole purpose of striking first. If I had closed the case hastily, wouldn't that have played right into his hands? He's afraid of appearing in court—he can't afford to lose face like that." After saying this, he turned to look at the Seventh Prince. "Is everything settled now?"

The Seventh Prince said, "Of course. When I step in, what doesn't get done? Master Wu and the neighbors have been sent away, and that foster father of Xiaoshu has been captured too. You can decide how you want to deal with him later, depending on your appetite. But those trivial matters are easy to handle; your mother is a step ahead, planning to have two sedan chairs enter the gates at once. She has already found you a Primary Consort; you'd better figure out a plan quickly!"

Hongce’s expression shifted, and he asked Dingyi, "Is this true?"

"Are you having the time of your life? A blessing from the heavens!" Before Dingyi could answer, the Seventh Prince added with a sour tone, "If you really do take a Primary Consort, then we’ll be on the same level again, and don't blame me if I try to dig under your wall." He was met with a massive eye-roll from Hongce.

Two sedan chairs? What kind of joke was this? He was both anxious and furious. If it were just his own frustration, that would be one thing, but Dingyi... she surely had grievances that couldn't be spoken! He leaned down to check her expression and said, "I'm sorry. Being with me has forced you to suffer so much. I was busy with official business in the palace, and by the time the eunuch brought the message, it was already too late. Fortunately, there was Seventh Brother; I really should thank him this time. Here’s what we’ll do: Sha Tong has brought the carriage to the outer palace gate. Go back and wait for me in the carriage; I will be there shortly."

"Where are you going?" She looked at him with a worried, mournful face. "Are you going to see your mother? When will you be back?"

He managed a strained smile. "Soon. I’ll be back after I speak with her."

He let go of her and headed toward the back of the residence. The Seventh Prince watched him go, muttering, "The stubborn streak is back; he’s probably off to fight with his mother."

Hongce walked quickly, storming into the Enhui Qingyu residence. Chen Jing stepped forward to welcome him, but was pushed aside by a wave of his hand.

The Noble Consort Dowager was being served by a palace maid to wash her hands. Seeing his frantic, flushed appearance, she understood, but she didn't reveal it. She ignored him, wiping her hands dry in a leisurely manner, then sat on a stool to let the maid massage her pressure points and apply ointment.

He quelled his temper slightly, but still swept his sleeves and performed a formal bow. Only then did the Noble Consort Dowager grunt and open her lips to speak: "Sit! You’ve come at the right time; I have a portrait here I want you to see." She signaled for Chen Jing to unfurl the scroll. On it was a beauty in palace attire, wearing a hair-pin set and a water-pink robe with patterned flowers, toying with a circular fan in her hands with a joyful smile on her face. She pointed to it. "This is the daughter of Grand Academician Li Yizhou of the Hanlin Academy. She is proficient in everything—the zither, chess, calligraphy, and painting. It would not be an insult to you to make her your consort. I already told Dingyi earlier: she can enter the Prince of Chun’s residence as a side consort, but there must be someone above her. A grand princely residence requires a mistress with a prestigious reputation; you cannot let a girl of unknown origins manage your residence. This is for the sake of your own reputation in public." As she studied the portrait, a smile appeared on her face. "I think this girl is excellent. Her father is a first-rank official, and her mother is the fourth aunt of the old Prince Gong’s family. She is a proper young lady from a prestigious family. In what way is she inferior to your side consort? The marriage was approved in the palace before the New Year; we can hold the wedding in the second month. Don't worry—as for how the wife and concubines should interact, once I call this girl in for an audience, I will naturally instruct her. As for that Dingyi of yours, tell her to restrain herself. If she falls into my hands again, I won't be as reasonable as I was today."

Hongce held back his rage for a long time, waiting until the Noble Consort Dowager had finished speaking. Only then did he bow and say, "Mother, there is no need to summon her. Your son has already set his heart on one person; there is no room for a second on my bed. As for these noble ladies and golden branches, your son wants none of them. I only want Dingyi. Our feelings have weathered many storms; it is long past the point where anyone else can wedge themselves in between us. I ask you to rescind your order. Even if you have the palace issue a decree, your son does not care about disobeying it. When the time comes, would you like to see me stripped of my title and thrown into prison?"

The Noble Consort Dowager was struck with amazement. "Are you possessed? What do you mean you only want her? When you said that before, I took it as a childish whim. But today you repeat it—has she fed you some kind of love potion? Listen to me well: giving her the title of Side Consort is already a tremendous favor. She would do best not to harbor dreams of climbing higher. If she has any improper thoughts, I will see to it that she is smashed into a thousand pieces. You will marry the Li girl; your parents' command is one weight, and the terrifying authority of the Imperial household is another. If you dare to disobey, if the Primary Consort does not enter the gates, then don't even think about enjoying your Side Consort alone. I will have her sent to a nunnery to have her hair shorn; the Aisin Gioro clan has had cases of people becoming monks, one more won't make a difference."

By now, the masks were torn off. Hongce had not expected her to show even a shred of affection. Perhaps in the past she was just headstrong and disregarded her son's feelings, but now that she was older, she remained just as self-centered.

"Mother, do you not care about breaking your son’s heart?" He kept his head lowered, his tone unable to hide his sorrow. "Your son has never known what love is since he was a child. You brought me into this world—did you ever care for me? Others have a foster mother and a birth mother looking after them, both showering them with love. What about me? When I come to your palace to pay my respects, have you ever looked at your son with honest eyes? When your son was being ostracized and treated unfairly, did you ever say a single word for me? Now that your son is grown and no longer needs anyone’s protection, I still have a hole in my heart. I long for someone to treat me with sincerity. I have found her, but who knew it would go against your wishes? You want to force a stranger upon me and make your son’s life unbearable—is this your heart of maternal love?"

The Noble Consort Dowager, stung by his questioning, was consumed by rage. She nodded indignantly. "Very good, truly a 'good' son. I do everything for your sake, and not only are you ungrateful, but you turn around and blame me. What right do you have to speak of the affairs of the older generation? Why am I like this? Go ask your good Imperial Father! I withered in the deep palace for half my life; I was wronged, I was helpless—who pitied me? And how was your Imperial Father? When Murong Jinshu was absent, he was all kindness to you. But the moment Murong Jinshu offered him a smile, he rolled to her side as if he were scalded by boiling water. That is the deep affection of the men of your Aisin Gioro family! I may not have looked after you well, but that is the fault of your Manchu tradition of fostering children out to be raised by others. You blame me, but who should I blame?"

She had her own bitterness, which Hongce understood, but why must the mistakes of the previous generation be allowed to continue? He became even more determined. "Mother has suffered those hardships, yet you want your son to walk the same old path as Father. I don't feel I am wrong in loving someone. Meeting Dingyi now is the best possible timing. With no third person interfering, I do not owe a debt to any innocent woman; I live more honestly than Father. Has Mother never hoped that Father would love you with his whole heart? Since you have been through this, why can’t you fulfill your son’s wish? The women of the Imperial family are all filled with sorrow; you are trapped in a city of misery, yet you want to find ways to drag others in. Even if Father were here today, my words would remain the same: my capacity is limited; I am only responsible for one person in my life. Call me stubborn, call me a failure, I accept it. I have been a superfluous person since the day I was born. If Mother cannot stand to see me, just pretend you never gave birth to this unfilial son!"

He finished speaking with painful clarity, leaving the Noble Consort Dowager so furious that she felt as though she might ascend to the heavens. She gave a violent struggle, and the two-inch-long nail she had grown broke off into the palm of the palace maid. The maid was shaking like a sieve, kneeling on the ground and kowtowing incessantly. She glared at her viciously, but had no time to settle accounts with her. She snatched a tea cup from the table and hurled it at Hongce. "For the sake of a woman, you dare to raise your voice to your own mother! You unfilial thing, my ten months of pregnancy were in vain, all to have you anger me like this today!"

He did not dodge. The cup lid struck his brow, cutting a deep gash, and blood immediately gushed out. The eunuchs and maids were stunned by the sight. Chen Jing stepped up, trembling, to staunch the blood, but was pushed away by Hongce’s hand. He bowed upward. "Your son did not mean to defy Mother. Doing this today was a last resort; please forgive me, Mother. I will say no more, lest I anger Mother further. Please calm your fire; your son will return now, and in a few days, I will come back to beg for Mother’s forgiveness."

He swept his sleeves and stepped out of the Enhui Qingyu residence. The blood continued to pour, a warm sheet spreading to his jaw and dripping onto the dragon patterns on his chest. Afraid of frightening Dingyi, he pulled out a handkerchief to cover the wound. He walked on, feeling disheartened, his feet heavy as if filled with lead.

She was not in the carriage; she had been standing by the shaft waiting for him. Seeing his wretched state, she didn't fuss, but helped him into the carriage and silently bit her lip as she tended to his wound.

The fact that she didn't say a word made him somewhat afraid. He said softly, "It's just a minor injury, it doesn't matter."

She nodded. "When we get back, we must have a physician look at it; I fear it will leave a scar." Her throat choked up, and it took a long time for her to calm down. She raised a hand to touch his face. "Does it hurt? A little lower and it would have injured your eye."

He found it more painful that she was suffering this physical agony than if he had been beaten himself. She wanted to hold back the tears, but they fell anyway. She leaned forward, resting her head on his knee. She didn't make a sound, but she was shivering with sobs she couldn't suppress.

Hongce felt a sourness in his heart and patted her back. "A man must be strong; this little injury counts for nothing. Don't cry. If losing a few drops of blood can make the Dowager Consort change her mind, it is worth it."

She looked up, her eyes red. "If I had known you would be beaten, I would have preferred you to marry someone else."

He smiled. "Are you silly? The pain lasts only a moment; if I married someone else, the torment would last a lifetime. I just made it clear to her; I asked her to abandon that idea. Whether she cared for me in the past or not, she need not concern herself with my marriage."

Dingyi hesitated. "She must be very angry. If this reaches the palace or Changchun Garden, and the matter is pushed to the top, we will truly be..."

"It will never end. If they drive me into a corner, let’s just elope." He spoke of such a topic with surprising ease. He pulled her up, helped her sit beside him, and smiled. "Are you willing to go to the ends of the earth with me? Let’s be a pair of ordinary husband and wife, a man who plows and a woman who weaves."

Many hopeless lovers contemplate this step, though they don't actually do it. Having his heart was enough for her. She sighed, leaning against his shoulder: "That would be wonderful, but it would be too hard on you. What am I? I was like a weed to begin with. To drag a precious, gold-enveloped Prince like you down to suffer with me? But if it really comes to that, don't be afraid. I will earn money to support you."

He hummed a lingering "Oh." "Apart from being a Prince, I don't seem to know how to do anything else. In case we run out of food, you can take me to set up a fortune-telling stall on the street corner!"

The two of them found joy in their misery, their heads resting against one another as they laughed. But once the laughter faded, the worries resumed. Dingyi drooped her eyebrows and asked: "What did your mother say in the end? The beating couldn't be for nothing. Once she saw the blood, she must have felt guilty for a long time. Then she said 'forget it, children have their own fortunes,' let them be—is that what happened?"

He curled his lips slightly. "It didn't go that smoothly, but at least she won't keep pushing it. Now that I think about it, my words just now were a bit harsh; I fear I hurt her heart. But if I didn't act that way, she would live forever in her own walled city, never considering the feelings of others."

Everything started because of her, so Dingyi was also quite upset. She lowered her head and said, "Then, in a few days when her anger fades, I will go to kowtow and beg for her forgiveness. If she really hates me that much, I’ll take a beating—I’m tough-skinned, I can take it."

He shook his head, leaning back against the cushion. "The rift between her and me does not stem from you. Ice three feet thick is not formed in a single day. Even if it weren't for the marriage, there would be other disagreements. I suppose it is just the shallowness of our mother-son bond."

In his heart, family affection had always been important. Parents, siblings—he cared for every one of them, even though often they didn't necessarily care for him. He had never intended to burn bridges, but he had been pushed to the edge. Knowing he held Dingyi in such high regard, to allow a village rustic to testify against her—not only did it ignore his face, but it disregarded all proper decorum. The Noble Consort Dowager had been starved of love for too long; she had forgotten the true feelings of humanity. Dingyi had not had an easy time over the years, and if he did not protect her, who else in this world could?

He took her hands and rubbed them between his palms. "Let’s not dwell on this for now. Later, I will send more geshida [guards] to your place. No matter who sends for you, have them report to me first. You are not allowed to follow them blindly. I’ve calculated the time; Rujian should be arriving in the capital in the next two days. Once he arrives, our family can spend the New Year in peace. As for the rest, let’s talk about it after the festival is over.”