Against the Current - Chapter 64

Chapter 64 - Fear

Shuran continued with a smile, "Now that you understand, stop crying. You don't know this, but the Eldest Young Master also had me keep some fine things for you... Just wait a moment." With that, she stood up and left, returning shortly after with a pink bundle. Sitting down beside Xianglan, she opened it layer by layer to reveal hair oil, rouge, face powder, and scent sachets inside, and smiled as she said, "These were all specially set aside for you by the Eldest Young Master. They are the exact same quality as the ones given to the young misses of each courtyard—even your Auntie Qinglan doesn't have the face for this. Furthermore, there is also a top-quality bolt of fabric; the Eldest Young Master instructed me to have a fine set of clothes tailored for you and sent over once they are finished."

Xianglan's heart sank lower and lower, and she kept her head down without speaking. Seeing that Xianglan remained sullen and devoid of any shy expression, Shuran thought to herself: Oh no, could it be that this little maid has no feelings for the Eldest Young Master? Daring not to press further, she simply covered up the items on the table and said, "Your hair is a mess, sister, and your face is tear-stained. You should wash up and groom yourself. If you don't mind, use my things." As she spoke, she instructed the young errand girls to fetch hot water, personally brought out her own cosmetic box, and propped up a clean, bright rhombic flower mirror.

After Xianglan washed her face, Shuran took out a small round box of purple-gold enamel. Twisting it open, it revealed a milky-yellow ointment inside. Shuran smiled and said, "This is a fragrant cream to moisturize the skin; it contains flower extracts and medicinal herbs. It's different from the box of ointment the Eldest Young Master sent you—you can apply this to your face daily." She then picked up an ebony comb to help Xianglan comb her hair, twisting it into a sleek, glossy bun, and prepared to tuck the eight-treasure hairpin Lin Jinlou had given her into it.

Xianglan hurriedly stopped her, saying, "No, we shouldn't. It's better to use my old silver hairpin instead."

Shuran smiled and said, "This was bestowed upon you by the Eldest Young Master. Feel free to wear it with peace of mind."

Xianglan replied, "Such a precious item—I am unworthy of it. Having it on my head makes me feel quite uneasy. It would be better for sister to ask the Eldest Young Master to take it back first..."

Before she could finish her sentence, a voice piped up from the doorway: "Why do you keep going on about being worthy or unworthy? It's enough to drive a person mad. I say you are worthy, so you are worthy." Lin Jinlou strolled in leisurely.

Startled, Xianglan thought to herself how this King of Hell seemed like an unshakeable ghost refusing to leave. Truly terrified now, she hurriedly stood up and hid behind Shuran.

Seeing Xianglan's fear, Lin Jinlou was slightly displeased, yet he also felt that her timid, frightened little appearance was rather endearing. He stopped in his tracks and simply stared at her.

Taking in the situation with crystal clarity, Shuran excused herself on the pretext of fetching water with a basin and left.

Staring fixedly at the floor, Xianglan saw a pair of black official boots stepping closer and closer. She retreated backward until she hit a corner with nowhere else to run, still not daring to raise her head.

Lin Jinlou's lazy voice rang out right above her crown: "How is it that you even dare to refuse something your master gives you, hmm? Still don't want to follow me?" As he spoke, he lifted Xianglan's chin with his fingers, his eyes locking straight onto hers.

Those eyes were icy and mocking, carrying an aggressive, chilling menace that left one guessing his true intentions. Feeling deeply uncomfortable and frightened, Xianglan shivered all over. She felt a wave of coldness ripple straight from the soles of her feet up to the crown of her head, and a few teardrops spilled from her eyes, rolling down her cheek onto Lin Jinlou's hand as she choked out, "This servant... is afraid of the First Young Madam..."

Lin Jinlou let out a soft breath. Ah, so that was it. The anger in his chest dissipated by more than half. A smile returned to his face as he gently wiped the tears from Xianglan's face. Xianglan trembled, gritting her teeth but ultimately not daring to dodge away.

Lin Jinlou said, "What are you afraid of her for? Tomorrow I'll divorce her." While speaking, he leisurely re-inserted the golden hairpin back into Xianglan's hair, inspected her from the left and right, and remarked, "There are eight pieces in this set. Tomorrow when I take you into the household as my concubine, I'll bestow all of them upon you to wear." With that, he planted a kiss on her left cheek.

Xianglan wanted to slap him across the face, but she didn't dare. She could only stand with her head bowed, her hands gripping her tunic so tightly that her knuckles had turned somewhat pale.

At that moment, someone lightly tapped on the door outside, and Jixiang's subdued voice whispered, "Eldest Young Master, Eldest Young Master! Magistrate Fang from the military camp is outside seeking an audience, saying he has urgent business requiring your instructions."

Lin Jinlou called out toward the door, "Understood!" Looking at Xianglan, he pinched her cheek and said, "Go back now. They won't dare do anything to you. If anyone bullies you, just tell me, and I'll deal with them for you." Reaching the doorway, he beckoned Shuran over, gave her a few instructions, and then strode off in a hurry.

Xianglan let out an inward sigh of relief, her limbs feeling utterly weak. She hurriedly pulled the hairpin out of her hair. Shuran then entered, insisting on personally escorting Xianglan back. No matter how much Xianglan declined, Shuran wouldn't listen and simply carried a lantern along beside her.

Stepping into the courtyard of the Zhichun Pavilion, they found everything quiet all around. The lights in the main room were completely extinguished, though the east and west wing rooms were brightly lit. Standing at the courtyard entrance, Yings Shuang caught sight of Xianglan's return and hurriedly hurried back inside.

Bidding farewell to Shuran, Xianglan stepped inside and discovered that Xiaojuan and the others had not yet returned. Only the bed curtain in Yindie's room was drawn down, with someone vaguely lying inside. Dragging her heavy footsteps to the bed, she collapsed onto it. Lying there for a moment, she suddenly grabbed a handkerchief and furiously scrubbed at the spot where Lin Jinlou had kissed her. She was terrified of Lin Jinlou—scared to death of him—and even more terrified of genuinely becoming a concubine in the Lin family.

Her heart felt as heavy as a thousand-jin weight, pressing down on her so hard she could barely breathe. She only wanted to cast off her bonded servant status and live a peaceful, ordinary life with her parents. Even though she had already been humbled to the dust in this lifetime—serving masters, driven at their beck and call, and suffering abuse and beatings—her bones remained fundamentally proud and unyielding. Serving as a humble slave now was merely a matter of temporary endurance, constantly reminding herself that such days would eventually pass. If she could never shake off the stigma of servitude and had to live out her life swallowing her pride, she would rather simply die right then and there.

At that exact moment, Chunling walked in, sat down on the bed, and nudged Xianglan. "Hey, I heard Sister Shuran escorted you back? Where on earth did you go? How is it that she ended up walking you home?"

Forcing a smile, Xianglan replied, "It's nothing, we just happened to be going the same way."

Clearly refusing to believe her, Chunling stared suspiciously at Xianglan's face for a long moment and said, "That can't be right, can it? Sister Shuran just went inside to speak with the Auntie, and she couldn't stop praising you..."

This string of remarks made Xianglan even more restless. Sitting straight up, she said, "If you don't believe me, go ask Shuran yourself." Using that as an excuse, she went off to wash up.

A sudden snort echoed from Yindie's bed, followed immediately by Yindie's voice: "Look at that, putting on airs already. You can't even be asked a couple of questions now."

With a dark expression, Chunling flicked her handkerchief and walked out.

Xianglan walked out into the courtyard, leaned against a bizarre ornamental rock, and slowly squatted down. Weakly shielding her eyes with her arms, she whispered quietly to herself: "It doesn't matter, don't rush. I'll figure out a way. These unbearable days will eventually come to an end..."

Regardless of how Xianglan comforted herself, Yingshuang, upon seeing Xianglan return to the east wing, immediately ran back into the room to report to Zhao Yuechan. "Madam, that little bitch Xianglan is back, and Shuran walked her home. It seems the Eldest Young Master hasn't yet..."

Slamming her hand down fiercely on the table, Zhao Yuechan muttered with bitter hatred, "He wants to, but right now we're in the middle of Old Madam Zeng's mourning period. If he dares pull a stunt like that, I'll dare make him lose the official hat on his head, and even the old master will have to break his legs with a club!"

Yingshuang hurried forward to stroke Zhao Yuechan's back and soothe her. "Madam, calm your anger. It's not worth making yourself sick over a little bitch. You know the Eldest Young Master's temperament; today he fancies the east, tomorrow he fancies the west. Back then, he treasured Meimi like nothing else, but once Qinglan arrived, she was thrown to the back of his mind. Qinglan is even with child right now; just a couple of days ago he was doting on her endlessly, yet the moment he returns, he goes and flirts with a little maid."

Zhao Yuechan took a sip of tea to moisten her throat and said, "Whose courtyard does that Xianglan belong to? Wang Qinglan! I prepared agar for him and he wouldn't touch it, yet he specifically sets his sights on that little vixen Qinglan's maid. Tell me, isn't this directed by that little fox-spirit Qinglan? Seeing that her big belly prevents her from serving him, she's instigating a maid so she can stand on equal footing with me in the future."

Yingshuang mused, "Well... could that be? Does she even have that kind of brain?"

"Hmph, didn't you see how she managed the entire poetry society in such an orderly fashion? I was even wondering if all that clumsiness of hers was just an act."

"I don't think she's that shrewd; Madam shouldn't overthink it." As she spoke, Yingshuang pulled a hairpin from her hair and adjusted the candlelight to burn brighter.

Remaining silent, Zhao Yuechan slumped back onto the heated brick kang with a gloomy expression. The thought of what Lin Jinlou had said earlier in the outer study sent a chill through her heart: if Lin Jinlou truly intended to divorce her and take a new bride from among the Zhao family's daughters, then...

A shudder ran through her entire body. She instructed Yingshuang, "Tell the gatekeepers at the second portal to have a horse prepared at first light tomorrow morning. I am going back to my maiden home."