The Early Spring - Chapter 15

Chapter 15 - Never Crying in Front of You

Shang Zhitao felt a touch of emotion, and her eyes grew a little red again. When she wanted to thank him, Luan Nian had already gone inside. The door of the private dining room clicked shut, sealing away those vulgar words along with it. Holding Luan Nian's phone, Shang Zhitao stepped outside to catch the breeze. The Guangzhou night was humid and stifling, and she felt as though she were glued together by sweat.

Suddenly, she thought of Xin Zhaozhou, who was right there in Shenzhen, a place so close to her. Shang Zhitao thought people truly were strange and complex creatures; even after breaking up, a part of her still wanted to know whether the other person was doing well.

Luan Nian's phone buzzed several times. Shang Zhitao turned the screen face down, not daring to look, feeling as though glancing at it would mean prying into his privacy. She wasn't used to that sort of thing.

Even when she was dating Xin Zhaozhou, she had never once looked through his phone.

She stood outside waiting quietly. After nearly an hour, she saw them walking out. Most of them showed signs of intoxication, and only Luan Nian looked relatively sober. Noticing Luan Nian's gaze land on her hands, she hurriedly pressed his phone back against her ear, pretending to be in the middle of a conference call.

She wasn't actually stupid, after all.

Watching her put on such a convincing act was truly comical, and the corners of Luan Nian's mouth twitched upward in a faint smirk.

Shang Zhitao pretended to exchange a couple of remarks before lowering the phone and stepping forward. "Apologies, President Zhou. That conference call was terribly urgent, so I was stuck on it a bit too long. Please forgive me."

Zhou Yuchi, thoroughly happy from the drinks, gazed at her with sleepy eyes and waved a hand. "No worries. See you next time, Miss Shang." As he lifted an arm to sling it over Shang Zhitao's shoulder, Luan Nian gave Apollo a shove, steering him right into the path of Zhou Yuchi's arm. Smart as he was, Apollo smoothly looped an arm around Zhou Yuchi's shoulders instead.

"I'm not ready to call it a night yet. Shall we find another spot to sit for a while?" Apollo proposed. Zhou Yuchi was quite the party animal, and being accustomed to bending to the agency's arrangements, he nodded readily. "Sounds good, sounds good."

"I'll pass. I have a meeting tonight. Enjoy yourselves, President Zhou." Luan Nian offered the customary polite farewells to Zhou Yuchi.

Apollo waved to the group. "I'll see President Zhou off. See you back at headquarters." And off they went to round two.

Just like that, the gathering broke up. Shang Zhitao watched their cars drive away, then handed Luan Nian's phone back to him. "Thank you."

Luan Nian didn't say you're welcome. Sticking to his consistent philosophy, he didn't want to help in the first place—regardless of what you did, he wouldn't offer assistance; but once he did help, he didn't care whether you felt grateful or not.

"Did anyone call me?" Luan Nian asked her.

"I didn't look," Shang Zhitao said earnestly. "It's not polite."

Knowing she probably wasn't lying, Luan Nian lowered his gaze to look at her. "If you can't drink, never drink at all. That's my advice to you."

"Why?" Shang Zhitao never hesitated to ask when she didn't understand.

"Figure out the reason yourself."

Luan Nian had drunk a lot that evening and wanted to walk along the banks of the Pearl River. He told Shang Zhitao, "I'm going for a walk."

"I want to walk too," Shang Zhitao hurriedly chimed in. "I've never been to Guangzhou, and I want to seize this chance to see the Pearl River night view." With that, she dashed into a nearby cold-drink shop, bought two beverages, and ran back out to hand one to Luan Nian. "I'll treat you this once."

Luan Nian reached out to take it, took a large gulp, and turned to walk away.

Shang Zhitao trailed behind Luan Nian for a stroll. The Pearl River breeze was truly gentle, blowing her hair into a tousled mess, reminding her of the nights along the Qinhuai River that she loved so dearly. They walked for a long time, found two adjacent benches to sit on, and slowly finished their respective drinks.

There were long-legged beauties everywhere along the Pearl River, and Shang Zhitao wondered curiously if Luan Nian liked to look at them. She sneaked a glance at him, but he—having evidently seen more than enough beauties in his time—remained completely unfazed.

Her phone suddenly rang. She answered in a panic, and Lumi's voice came through with a heavy regional twang, "Where are you, sis?"

"Luke and I are by the Pearl River." She answered truthfully.

"What's this? Spending the night out? Found a shortcut to corporate counterattack?" Lumi teased her.

Shang Zhitao instinctively glanced at Luan Nian, lowering her voice. "No, we're heading back right now."

Lumi chuckled brightly. "What's the rush? Chat more with Luke. I hear Luke is getting promoted soon—better pave your own path."

Shang Zhitao had no idea how to respond. She didn't care whether Luan Nian got promoted; she only cared whether she would get laid off by him. But then again, if Luan Nian got promoted, wouldn't it be even easier for him to fire her?

At this thought, Shang Zhitao felt a wave of sheer terror wash over her. She had lost her temper at him just this morning!

Shang Zhitao was truly overthinking things.

From Luan Nian's perspective, her little flare-up was like a tiny kitten baring its teeth at him; a single finger of his could easily subdue her.

The guilty, stealthy glances she kept stealing at him were all caught in his peripheral vision, leaving him with the lingering, hazy impression that Shang Zhitao was trying to seduce him. Yet Luan Nian had zero interest in Shang Zhitao. In his eyes, she was far too mediocre. That momentary distraction earlier was merely basic masculine instinct at play.

Mediocrity wasn't an unforgivable sin, but he worked in the creative field and preferred visually striking women.

"Let's go." He stood up and began walking forward. Taxis were hard to hail along the Pearl River, so they had to walk a stretch. Shang Zhitao stood up and followed him. By now, he was acting as if wound up with a spring, his long legs eating up the ground at a brisk pace, as though all that alcohol he had consumed had vanished into thin air. Shang Zhitao jogged to keep up. "Luke, I can't keep pace." She panted slightly. "Could you... slow down a bit?"

"If you can't keep up, hail a cab yourself."

...

How could this man be so bizarre? He had been fine just a moment ago! Why was he putting on a cold face now? Mentally cursing him as a weirdo, Shang Zhitao stopped dead in her tracks. Hail a cab by herself it was, then! What was so great about him anyway?

She was being far too naive.

Where on earth was it easy to hail a taxi along the Pearl River at night? The two of them ended up standing at opposite ends, each trying to hail a cab independently. After a dozen minutes, the lucky Luan Nian finally managed to flag down a car. All of Shang Zhitao's temper instantly vanished; she hurried over in a few steps, pulled open the car door, climbed inside, and smiled at Luan Nian. "Thank you for giving me a ride." She could bend and stretch as needed, never finding it shameful to lower her head when necessary.

Luan Nian ignored her, neither kicking her out nor saying a word, keeping his head down as he replied to private messages on his phone.

Enduring the ride to their destination, Shang Zhitao practically leaped out of the car, offering a respectful bow. "Thank you, Luke, for teaching me so much today, and thank you for letting me share the ride." With that, she turned and fled.

Rushing into the elevator lobby, she swiped her room card for the correct floor, stabbed the close-door button in a frenzy, and finally let out a long breath of relief.

When she entered the room, Lumi was putting on a facial mask. Dressed in a silk slip nightgown with a slit running all the way up to the root of her thighs, she had her long legs propped up on the table and let out a whistle the moment Shang Zhitao walked in. "Not bad, girl, touring the Pearl River with Luke. Can you get a direct promotion to regular staff tomorrow?"

Shang Zhitao raised her hands in surrender. "Master Lumi, I have a request."

"Speak your mind."

"Just please don't mention Luke. I'll bow to you."

"Mention Luan Nian, then?" Lumi continued teasing her.

"Don't..."

Lumi ripped off her facial mask and burst into loud laughter. "So scared of him? What a pushover. Teacher will teach you a trick."

"What trick?"

"Any man you're afraid of—find a way to sleep with him. Once you've slept with him, you'll realize all men are cut from the exact same cloth."

Shang Zhitao was amused in spite of herself. "You're afraid of Luke too. Why don't you sleep with him?"

"I'm afraid my boyfriend would hack me to pieces."

Utterly defeated.

Shang Zhitao retrieved her pajamas from her suitcase and put them on. Her nightwear consisted of a mid-sleeve nightgown adorned with a pink bow collar, looking thoroughly cute. Feeling a bit shy about changing in front of Lumi, she headed toward the bathroom, only to be stopped by Lumi. "Hey, hey, hey! We're all women here, what's there that hasn't been seen before!"

Fair enough.

Steeling her resolve, Shang Zhitao stripped off her dress. As the plump curves of her chest bounced slightly, Lumi let out an exclamation. "Goodness gracious! Goodness gracious! You've got hidden treasures like these!" Pointing straight at Shang Zhitao, she declared, "You're a walking treasure chest!"

Panicking, Shang Zhitao hurriedly pulled her nightgown over her head, crossing her arms over her chest as she looked at Lumi with a helpless expression. As Lumi walked past her on her way to wash her face, she clicked her tongue. "Remember this, Shang Zhitao: you're a woman carrying nuclear weapons. Don't surrender so easily."

Shang Zhitao had no clue what nuclear weapons she was supposed to have. After a day that felt like an outright war, she only wanted to take a shower, get a good night's sleep, and get back to work tomorrow. Tomorrow was well worth looking forward to because, at long last, she wouldn't have to be tied to Luan Nian.

Luan Nian was as unpredictable as the weather. He ran hot and cold with people, and could never be described as particularly nice or particularly awful to her. Sometimes Shang Zhitao wanted to ask him for advice, yet she always worried her questions would sound utterly idiotic.

Indeed, in front of Luan Nian, she felt like a fool. Yet, despite being a fool, she had harbored wicked, romantic urges toward him time and time again today.

By the time she and Lumi turned off the lights and lay in their respective beds, Shang Zhitao's lingering doubts still hadn't faded. She couldn't help asking Lumi, "Lumi, have you ever felt like you were stupid?"

"Why on earth would I want to feel stupid?"

"I've constantly felt stupid these past few days."

The darkness lent people courage, and for the first time, Shang Zhitao opened her heart to Lumi. She felt constant confusion during her brief days stepping into the working world: "Do you know why I'm afraid of Luke?"

"Why?"

"That boss interview I wrote was real—Luke advised me to change jobs during the interview itself, and he brought it up again later. He thinks I'm not good enough." Shang Zhitao felt a pang of sadness. She knew her resume was the least impressive among all the peers hired in her cohort, but had she really performed so miserably that Luan Nian found zero redeeming qualities in her? She was genuinely puzzled.

"Luke told you to quit twice?" Lumi asked from the darkness.

"Yes. So should I change jobs?"

"You shouldn't change jobs. Do you know what you should do? You should go to sleep right now, wake up bright and cheery tomorrow morning, and treat whatever Luke said like a fart in the wind." Lumi felt a tinge of sympathy for Shang Zhitao. Being targeted by Luke right after joining the company was tough enough, but let's not forget who Luke was—before long, once his formal appointment came down, the entire Chinese branch would be under his command. But she couldn't tell Shang Zhitao any of that just yet; the girl was already walking on eggshells.

Lumi, Shang Zhitao's very first corporate mentor, was truly a wonderful person.

Though she lacked extraordinary talent, she possessed decent luck. She had already fallen asleep in her bed, but Lumi lay awake with her eyes open, quietly plotting how to help this little junior colleague keep her job. How could anyone want to fire such a wonderful girl—someone who worked without a single complaint and possessed an absolute top-tier personality?

From before dawn until late at night, Shang Zhitao slept exceptionally soundly. After all, being barely past twenty had its perks; waking up the next morning brought back that clear-headed, invincible youthful spirit. Having sent a message the night before saying she wouldn't be joining breakfast, she tiptoed through her morning routine, slipped into an oversized T-shirt, and headed down to the dining hall with a fresh, makeup-free face. Having barely eaten anything the previous evening, she was genuinely starved and piled her plate high with food.

Holding her breakfast tray and searching for a seat, she spotted Luan Nian sitting by the window. Despite having heavily imbibed the night before, not a trace of it lingered on him this morning. A stray ray of morning light fell across the dining table before him, lending him a touch of warmth and humanity.

Human or not, he was still someone Shang Zhitao neither wanted nor dared to provoke. Moving quickly, Shang Zhitao darted behind a pillar, scanned her surroundings, and found a secluded corner. The stealthy evasion wasn't lost on Luan Nian; it was utterly furtive and bizarre.

Shang Zhitao really was hopeless.

Luan Nian had witnessed far too many people who knew what they wanted. In a setting like this, others would walk straight up to him and strike up a conversation: Is Luke eating alone? They'd chat about anything—thoughts on current work, career planning. Back when he first started working at the US headquarters during a team-building event, he had watched with his own eyes as a peer paid out of pocket for a seat upgrade just to sit beside the boss. The corporate world worked like that; there was only one boss, and if you hid in the background, you could never expect to be noticed.

With such a golden opportunity right in front of her, she had bolted away like a stray dog.

Hopeless Shang Zhitao sat in the corner of the restaurant, eating her breakfast in blissful serenity, feeling a wave of triumph at having successfully evaded Luan Nian. As long as she successfully dodged Luan Nian, it counted as another day she hadn't been fired. She liked to tease herself with that thought.

Yet good times truly never lasted. The moment she popped a blueberry into her mouth, she saw someone sit down directly across from her. Raising her eyes to find Luan Nian, she froze for a full second before greeting him, "Morning, Luke. Have you eaten?"

"Where are the meeting minutes?"

... "I sent them to you last night."

"Sent them where?"

"To your inbox."

Luan Nian pulled out his phone, flipped open his email app, and tossed the screen right in front of Shang Zhitao. "Which one is it?"

Shang Zhitao clearly remembered seeing the prompt that the email had been sent successfully, but it was nowhere to be found in Luan Nian's inbox. For a moment, she had no idea what went wrong. "Can I run upstairs and grab my laptop?"

"If you even forget to send meeting minutes, you might as well consider handing in your resignation today."

Hearing him drop that line again, the pleasant morning mood instantly evaporated. "If I didn't send them, I'll resign today." She stood up. "I'll go upstairs to get my computer. Please wait a moment."

On her way to retrieve her laptop, she replayed her sending actions from the previous night over and over in her mind, recalling the successful transmission prompt. Certain nothing was wrong, she grabbed her computer, hurried back downstairs to the restaurant, sat back down across from Luan Nian, opened her laptop, and pulled up her outbox. There was indeed an email she had sent late last night, but the recipient was lukelu, not lukeluan. Lime had another employee whose English name was Luke, and whose last name was Lu.

Pressing her lips tightly together, she uttered not a single word. Luan Nian was right; he genuinely hadn't received the email. The mistake was entirely hers—she had sent it, but to the wrong person.

"I'm sorry, Luke. I sent it to the wrong person."

"So." Luan Nian looked at Shang Zhitao, his gaze sharp. "You sent yesterday's confidential meeting information to a stranger? In that case, you might as well not have sent anything at all." Luan Nian stood up. "Make sure you don't send your resignation letter to the wrong inbox, Flora."

Shang Zhitao didn't reply to him. She didn't dare open her mouth because she knew the moment she spoke, she would burst into tears. She refused to cry in front of Luan Nian. In his eyes, she was already the most incompetent one—she always had been. If she cried, he would only look down on her even more.

Clenching her teeth tight, she kept silent and held back her tears.

In all the years that followed, no matter what storms, doubts, hardships, or psychological collapses she encountered, she never shed a single tear in front of Luan Nian. She could bawl her eyes out in front of friends and family, but in front of Luan Nian, never once.

She sat alone in the restaurant for a while before returning to her room. Lumi was already awake. After exchanging greetings, the two of them dialed into the marketing department's conference call. That marathon meeting lasted the entire morning. Alex assigned her a mountain of learning tasks and supporting duties; besides continuing to coordinate with the planning and creative centers, she was also tasked with learning PR and marketing events. Once the call finally wrapped up, she checked her phone and saw a message from Luan Nian: "Still haven't sent it to me?"

Thinking Luan Nian was asking about her resignation letter, she replied: "Apologies, I was stuck on a conference call all morning and haven't had time to write my resignation letter yet." Phrased as though she wouldn't write one if she weren't busy with meetings—a girl like Shang Zhitao was quite adept at cheering others on while pulling her own little brazen stunts. Without the skill to muddy the waters and coast along, she wouldn't have developed such a resilient mindset. The setback from that morning had long since vanished into thin air.

"The meeting minutes," Luan Nian replied.

"Oh, oh, oh! I thought you were asking for my resignation letter!"

"?" Luan Nian sent back a question mark. This girl's brain must have had a screw loose.

Are you out of your mind?