Wish You All the Best - Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Ci'en Temple is located outside the Anding Gate, north of the city. It is a thousand-year-old temple that was bestowed and rebuilt by imperial decree at the founding of the current dynasty, then renamed Baoguo Ci'en Temple. Beyond the typical Main Hall and Great Dharma Hall found in common temples, there is a Scripture Hall in the southwest called the "Rotating Sutra Repository." It is a wooden pavilion ingeniously fitted with a mechanism that allows a person to push it to rotate. Inside, it houses a vast collection of scriptures; it is said that rotating the repository once signifies having read all the Buddhist treasures contained within, symbolizing the perfect completion of the cycle of reincarnation.

Because of the existence of this Rotating Sutra Repository, countless scholars and poets have left their inscriptions and calligraphy on the temple walls throughout the dynasties, and monks have traveled thousands of miles to practice here. However, it is said that for hundreds of years, no matter how devotedly countless monks have studied, not one has ever been heard to have completed a full rotation of the repository in their lifetime.

When Jiafu arrived at Ci'en Temple, it was exactly noon. There were few pilgrims in the temple, but upon reaching the foot of the mountain, she saw the Duke's mansion carriage parked there. Knowing that the person she wanted to see was indeed inside the temple, she entered the mountain gate and went straight to the Main Hall to offer incense and make a donation. After finishing, she came out and asked a guest-reception monk about the whereabouts of the pilgrims from the Duke’s mansion.

More than twenty years ago, the Tianxi Empress Yuan was infected with an epidemic. Because the epidemic was raging at the time, she was sent to Ci'en Temple to be quarantined and recuperate so as not to spread it in the imperial harem. The Empress Yuan lingered in illness for over a year, never showing signs of recovery and gradually worsening until she unfortunately passed away in the back temple. Because the Old Madam of the Pei family had frequently visited the temple during that time, the monks there were very familiar with her.

The guest-reception monk originally did not want to bother, but seeing Jiafu’s generous donation, he said: "The Old Duchess has gone to the back meditation quarters to rest; you must not go near there, female donor."

……

After the Old Madam of the Pei family finished burning incense and partook in some simple vegetarian food, she felt tired due to her advanced age, so Pei You'an escorted her to the meditation quarters for a short rest.

After the Pei Empress Yuan passed away, the Tianxi Emperor sealed off the meditation courtyard where she had lived while recuperating, allowing only her mother, the Old Duchess of Pei, to enter. Although more than twenty years had passed, and the current Emperor, who ascended the throne as the Prince of Shunan, did not favor the Pei family, he would not openly defy the decree of his late elder brother, the previous Emperor. Therefore, this secluded quadrangle meditation courtyard was still used exclusively by the Duke’s mansion. Normally, the gates were locked tight; if the Old Duchess was to visit, the temple would be notified in advance so they could unlock and clean it in preparation for her arrival.

Pei You'an knew that his grandmother often missed his aunt, who had unfortunately died young more than twenty years ago. Seeing her standing inside the threshold, he stopped and looked around.

Although word had been sent ahead yesterday and the place had been cleaned and organized, the season was now early winter. The meditation courtyard was filled with rustling yellow leaves and withered ivy. Fearing she would be overcome with emotion, he reached out to support her and said: "Grandmother, let's go inside; the wind is strong."

The Old Madam entered. Yuzhu and the two accompanying maids moved to serve her, but seeing that the Eldest Master had already stepped forward to remove the Old Madam's outer coat himself, and then crouched down to take off her shoes and place them neatly on the ground, the maids were somewhat startled. Yuzhu, seeing this, gave them a meaningful look and led them out together.

The Old Madam sat on the edge of the bed, looking down at her grandson.

Pei You'an gathered the Old Madam’s stockinged feet into his palms and massaged them slowly. After a moment, feeling them warm up, he helped her lie down slowly, lifted her feet, and tucked them under the quilt, saying: "Grandmother, please rest."

The Old Madam closed her eyes. Pei You'an sat beside her, keeping her company in silence. Once she had fallen asleep, he gently tucked the corners of the quilt, rose to stand by the window for a while, and then stepped out.

……

"The Old Duchess is also in the temple?"

Zhen Yaoting’s mind immediately conjured up the image of the maid he had seen yesterday. Although she wasn't the greatest beauty he had ever seen, for some reason, just one look had left him captivated and unable to forget her. His heart grew excited, and he nudged Jiafu: "Hurry, go have someone announce you. Since we happened to meet here, it would be rude not to go and pay our respects."

Jiafu knew the Old Madam had a habit of taking an afternoon nap; how could she listen to her brother? Moreover, the person she was here to see was not the Old Duchess of Pei at all.

She stood there for a moment, then turned to Zhen Yaoting and said: "I will go over and take a look then. Brother, you wait here at the front hall and don't wander off."

Zhen Yaoting agreed, then added with a cheeky grin: "If you see her, don't forget to mention me, so I can go pay my respects to the Old Madam too!"

Jiafu nodded vaguely and, accompanied by Tanxiang, passed through the main hall and headed southwest.

At this hour, naturally, one could not hear the morning bells or evening drums. Only when passing by a few low walls did the faint sound of Buddhist chanting accompanied by wooden fish resonate, making the surroundings seem even more tranquil.

The path under her feet was paved with white pebbles that, over the long years, had gradually worn into a dull grey color, with moss growing in the crevices. On both sides of the path grew ginkgo trees. At the end stood a thousand-year-old ancient tree with a trunk that soared straight into the sky. Its branches spread out like coiled dragons above the palace halls, covering half of the hip-and-gable roof. A gust of wind blew, and ginkgo leaves fell rustling from the sky, diagonally carpeting half of the roof, with a thick layer also piling up on the ground, as if a golden rain had fallen.

A man was standing beneath the quiet caisson ceiling of the Rotating Sutra Repository.

The beams around the caisson were painted with scenes of the Heavenly Dragons and the Eight Legions and the assembly of the Tathagata's Flower Treasury World; the Buddha lowered his eyes while the Vajra glared. The noon sun penetrated through the tops of the ginkgo trees above the caisson, casting a bright, square golden light. He stood at the edge where this golden light intersected with the dim shadows, his figure mottled, half-bright and half-dark. A fallen leaf drifted down from the caisson above his head, twirling in the air before slowly dropping beside his feet.

He remained with his head lowered, turning the scroll of scriptures in his hands, fully focused, his figure motionless.

Jiafu stood outside the threshold, watching the back of the man ahead.

Earlier, she had guessed he might come here. It was just a feeling. So she came over, wanting to try her luck.

Her luck seemed to be quite good; he was indeed in the Rotating Sutra Repository.

But now that she had truly found him, she suddenly felt uneasy again. She opened her mouth several times to call out to him, but closed it again. Just as she was hesitating, the man seemed to perceive the anomaly from behind, suddenly turned his face, and two gazes shifted toward her.

Jiafu’s heart skipped a beat. She immediately wore a smile on her face and called out "Eldest Cousin," her voice soft and melodious, very pleasant to the ear.

Seeing her there, Pei You'an did not seem overly surprised; he remained standing where he was.

"Why have you come here?" he asked simply.

Jiafu raised her eyes, meeting the two gazes he cast upon her.

"I cannot hide the truth from you; I came here this morning specifically to find you, Eldest Cousin. I have a matter I wish to consult with you about."

Her voice was very light, as if she lacked courage.

Pei You'an’s gaze rested on her face for a moment. He closed the scripture, placed it back on the shelf, and then turned to walk toward her.

He stopped. One outside the threshold, one inside, with a distance of seven or eight steps between them.

"What matter?" he asked.

"Yesterday, Yuzhu came to our house. Before she left, she secretly passed on a message to me, saying that you, Eldest Cousin, specifically instructed her to tell me not to use my current incense in the future. From what she said, it seems the incense I use is harmful to others. When I asked further, she couldn't explain and only said she was just passing on your words..."

Jiafu bit her lip.

"Your instruction, Eldest Cousin, is naturally correct, and I will follow it. It is just that I am truly confused, and since it involves a charge of harming others, I have been deeply unsettled. I didn't sleep at all last night, and this morning I had no heart for anything. Remembering that Yuzhu said you would be bringing the Old Madam to Ci’en Temple today, I simply came over. I have presumptuously come here to bother you, I..."

Pei You'an waved his hand, stopping her from finishing her sentence.

"Do you know what kind of incense you were burning on the day of my grandmother's birthday?" he asked, his gaze fixed on her face.

"Ambergris."

Jiafu answered immediately, without even blinking.

He remained silent, watching her with a scrutinizing expression.

Jiafu looked bewildered: "Eldest Cousin, why are you looking at me like that?"

"Where did the ambergris you used come from?"

"From the household warehouse."

"Do you know of frozen dragon brain?"

He paused and asked suddenly.

Jiafu nodded.

"When my father was alive, I remember occasionally hearing him mention it. He said it was a spice from South Tianzhu, similar to ambergris in nature but not as good."

Jiafu blinked and looked at him: "What about it?"

"I can tell you for certain that the so-called ambergris you used was actually frozen dragon brain. Quan Ge’s illness was caused by the frozen dragon brain you were burning. Frozen dragon brain is not just a spice; in the Western Regions, it can also be used as medicine, but a very small number of people are intolerant to this scent. Even a small amount of contact can cause symptoms of discomfort, and if mistakenly ingested, it can even be life-threatening. This is the case with Quan Ge. This is why he fell ill both times he came into contact with you."

Jiafu’s heart gave a sudden jolt.

She only knew that if Quan Ge inhaled frozen dragon brain he would fall ill, and after a few days, he would gradually recover. She didn't know that frozen dragon brain was actually medicinal and could be fatal. This was truly unexpected.

But by now, she had no way out. She had to convince him to believe her, and perhaps even guide him to help her—at the very least, he must not ruin her plans.

She revealed an anxious expression and shook her head repeatedly: "I truly didn't know! In my family’s warehouse, spices are categorized and stored by type. I have always used ambergris. This time, because I was coming to the capital, I discovered before leaving that the original box of incense cakes was almost gone, so I told someone to get new ones. It was all so hurried at the time; perhaps the warehouse servant made a mistake. I truly did not know!"

She suddenly opened her eyes wide, showing a look of shock: "Could it be... that you thought I intentionally wanted to harm Quan Ge, Eldest Cousin?"

She looked at Pei You'an, who seemed noncommittal, tears gradually shimmering in her eyes, her voice taking on a sobbing tone filled with grievance.

"I visited the Duke's mansion a few times when I was little, but Quan Ge wasn't even born then. In the last few years, I have been in Quanzhou mourning for my father. Even if I knew frozen dragon brain was bad, how would I know that Quan Ge couldn't touch it?"

She lowered her head and said no more, biting her lips tightly with her pearly teeth until they turned pale, as if she were trying hard to hold back tears that were about to fall. A crystal clear teardrop finally fell, splashing onto the ground before her feet.

She hurriedly turned her face away and raised her hand to wipe the corners of her eyes haphazardly.

While she was speaking just now, Pei You'an had been watching her, his expression cold, as if evaluating the truth of her words. Gradually, he turned his gaze away, refusing to look at her tearful appearance, and only said: "I suppose it was an unintentional mistake. Stop crying."

His voice was flat. But it sounded as though he believed her and was comforting her.

Jiafu could cry on command, so that was not difficult. Thinking of her late father and the last moment of her previous life, her eyes would naturally ache.

Originally, it was just to cry for him to see. But hearing his consolation, for some reason, her emotions spun out of control. Feeling incomparably wronged, she lowered her head and wept silently, tears falling patter-patter.

Pei You'an’s face, which had remained expressionless, began to show signs of unease. He looked at her several times, clenched his palms, and then relaxed them. After hesitating for a moment, he finally walked over, stopped before the threshold, tilted his head slightly toward her, and said in a low voice: "Stop crying. I believe you. Otherwise, why would I have only asked Yuzhu to pass on a message to remind you?"

"Think about it."

After finishing, he added another sentence, as if coaxing her.

He leaned over slightly, getting a bit close. Jiafu felt the warmth radiating from his body, like the gentle golden light from that piece of winter sun in the caisson.

She hurriedly turned her back, lowered her head to wipe the tear stains off her face, and only after her emotions had steadied did she turn back and whisper: "Thank you for being willing to believe me, Eldest Cousin."

Pei You'an had already taken a few steps back, his expression returning to its previous calmness. His gaze swept over her tear-stained face, and after a moment of contemplation, he said: "In the past two days, I have heard rumors about this matter, saying that you and Quan Ge clash in destiny, which I fear is unfavorable for your marriage prospects. Since this matter has nothing to do with you, I can help you clarify the cause of Quan Ge’s illness. If you do not wish for people to know it was caused by your misuse of spices, I can also choose not to mention you. Once I dispel my mother’s concerns, you and my second brother can proceed with the marriage."

Jiafu shook her head slowly.

Pei You'an was startled: "What is it? You are actually unwilling to clarify the misunderstanding?"

Jiafu secretly clenched her fists and said: "Eldest Cousin, it is my good fortune that your family is willing to accept someone of my background. But to tell you the truth, coming to the capital for this marriage was not my own intention. My grandmother is the head of the household, and I truly cannot defy her, so I had no choice but to follow the arrangements. Originally, I thought I would just settle my life this way, live out my days, and that would be it. But unexpectedly, due to a twist of fate, in the past two days, because of Quan Ge’s illness, I have incurred the dissatisfaction of Madam Song and the Madam, and the marriage will likely be put on hold..."

She paused and raised her eyes, meeting his gaze.

"May I dare to beg you, Eldest Cousin, to please hold your hand and act as if you don't know about this?"

Pei You'an frowned slightly: "Is that truly what you think? You would rather bear the reputation of a 'jinx' than marry into the Duke’s mansion?"

"Yes," Jiafu nodded, "The Duke’s mansion is noble, and it was never something I could reach for. Quan Ge falling ill because of the incense I mistakenly used, which led to the dissatisfaction of Madam Song and the Madam, is like destiny, and also an opportunity. I beg you, Eldest Cousin, to fulfill this wish for me. Whether I marry or not in the end, it is all fated; I will accept it."

Pei You'an looked at her, suddenly feeling that something didn't seem right, yet he couldn't quite grasp it. Suppressing the strange sensation welling up inside him, he finally nodded: "Since that is what you think, naturally I have no objections. However—"

His tone became abruptly severe.

"Since you didn't know before, it was an unintentional mistake, so I do not blame you. But now that you already know that frozen dragon brain is harmful to Quan Ge, even if you view the Duke’s mansion as a dangerous monster, as long as there is an occasion where Quan Ge is present, I will not permit you to use this incense to harm him again."

Jiafu looked up quietly, seeing him staring at her with furrowed brows and a stern expression. Daring not to refuse, she lowered her eyes and whispered: "There is no need for you to say it, Eldest Cousin; I know it myself."

Pei You'an flicked his robe, stepped over the threshold, and walked past her.

Jiafu stood for a moment, then turned to see that figure moving further and further away, gradually disappearing at the end of the ginkgo-lined path.