Overdo - Two Years of So Near, Yet So Far

Two Years of So Near, Yet So Far

Her heart gave a sharp, agonizing twitch. It was nothing more than a lie, yet it drained her of all strength. She had thought that even her hatred had been worn away to nothing; after two years of being worlds apart, a single, gentle lie from him was enough to leave her without a shred of resistance. She was so pathetic; in front of him, she was just this pathetic. She had long since lost all hope, and she had long since stopped daring to look back. Two tears fell, landing silently on the quilt. He said, "Susu, don't cry." As long as she didn't cry, he would do anything; he only wanted her to stop crying. Her thin shoulders trembled, and he pulled her into his arms, kissing away her tears. Once he held her, he could no longer suppress the longing in his heart. He wanted her, he wanted her, he wanted nothing but her. Even if there was no heart, having her person would be enough...

The sky began to brighten. On the beige fabric of the curtains, the pale gold patterns gradually became distinct, and one could vaguely make out the shapes of flowers. As the thin morning sunlight cast its glow over them, the pale gold designs were illuminated into a bright orange, blooming one by one before the eyes.

The curtains in the small sitting room were a pristine ivory white, embroidered with passionflower patterns—dense clusters of flowers and buds with intricate branches and leaves. Madame Murong sat there, personally sealing red envelopes for the Chinese New Year, preparing for the grandchildren to offer their seasonal greetings. Susu walked in and said softly, "Mother, Happy New Year." Madame Murong looked up to see her, her face full of smiles. "Ah, good child, Happy New Year. Why didn't you sleep a little longer? Is the third one still not up?"

A faint flush appeared on Susu’s face, and she said, "Yes." Madame Murong remarked, "You still get up so early. None of them are awake yet. There are a bunch of guests at your father’s place, so you don't need to go over. Go upstairs and check on the third one; if he’s awake, tell him to come down and have breakfast with us."

Susu had no choice but to head back to the bedroom. Murong Qingyi turned over, and seeing her walk in, his expression seemed to relax, as if a weight had been lifted. She didn't know what to say, so she simply sat down quietly. He lingered in bed for a moment, ultimately feeling uneasy. He glanced at her, but seeing her expression was indifferent—revealing nothing—he asked, "Is Mother up?"

She replied, "She is up." So he said, "Then I will get up too, so Father doesn't ask and say I'm lazy." She kept her head lowered, her fingers picking at the fine embroidery on the handkerchief in her hand; it felt like a raised scar, pressing sharply against her fingertips. He came out of the bathroom and, seeing her still sitting there motionless, couldn't help but call out, "Susu." The sound seemed to startle her, and she lifted her panicked eyes to look at him. He opened his mouth to speak but stopped, eventually only saying, "I—I’ll go down first to wish Father a Happy New Year."

Many relatives and friends arrived on New Year's Day to pay their respects, and Susu helped Madame Murong entertain, moving among the female guests. It was a busy time when suddenly, Weiyi let out a laugh. Madame Murong asked in a low voice, "This child, you're a mother yourself now, why are you still so immature? What are you giggling about for no reason?" Weiyi whispered, "Why would I be giggling for no reason? I just think Third Brother is amusing. In this short time, he’s already come in three times, and every time he just looks at Third Sister-in-law and walks away. Is he afraid she’s going to fly away?"

Madame Murong said with a smile, "Don't make fun of your Third Brother; look at your Third Sister-in-law, she’s uncomfortable again." Susu was already beet-red and, taking the excuse of greeting guests, walked far away to the door. Just then, Murong Qingyi strolled over. He looked up, saw her, paused, and then turned to walk back the other way. Susu let out a soft "Hey," and when he turned his head to look at her, she whispered, "Weiyi is making fun of us." Hearing this, he laughed for some reason, his brows and eyes relaxing as if brushed by a spring breeze.

Weiyi watched the two of them from afar and whispered to Madame Murong, "Mom, look, I haven't seen Third Brother smile like that all year." Madame Murong let out a soft sigh, "These two star-crossed lovers."

By the evening, Susu came to Madame Murong and said, "Mother, I’m going to head off now." Madame Murong glanced at Murong Qingyi and said, "That’s fine. It’s been noisy all day and it’s giving me a headache. You must be tired too. Your place is quieter, so you might as well go back and rest early." Susu responded with a "Yes," but then heard her continue, "Third one, you go along too. Just come back with Susu tomorrow morning." Murong Qingyi agreed and turned to call out, "Bring my car around."

Susu stood in silence for a moment before saying, "Everything is not yet settled at my place. I’m afraid that if any official business comes up, it might delay his work." The implication was very clear; she thought that given his usual temperament, he might flare up on the spot. To her surprise, Murong Qingyi said, "What official business would there be on the New Year? I’ll go and take a look. Whatever you lack there, I’ll have them brought over." Hearing him say this, Madame Murong felt relieved and added, "Exactly. Originally, that house was bought for the two of you to start your family. I am in favor of small families being independent, but I'm getting old and like to have you in front of my eyes every day, which is why I didn't have you move. It was my own selfishness. You young people, of course, prefer to live freely outside. Anyway, it’s very close to Shuangqiao, so coming and going is very convenient."

Listening to her tone, Susu felt an even deeper meaning behind it. She had always respected this mother-in-law, and since the words were filled with such sincere concern, she could not say anything more. Because she had always been detached in her manner, the staff there had inevitably kept things simple. She and Murong Qingyi drove back together, throwing the servants there into a bit of a flurry. Murong Qingyi saw that the house was as neat as new and tastefully decorated. She changed her clothes and came downstairs, choosing a book to read at random. Seeing her indifferent demeanor, he could only say, "It’s very quiet here." He walked around the room, looked it over, and said, "I’ll have someone change this rug tomorrow; the color doesn't match the curtains." After thinking for a moment, he said, "Or maybe I should change the curtains instead. What do you think? Should I change the curtains or the rug?"

She hadn't intended to answer, but she couldn't bring herself to be cruel. Furthermore, he was staring at her so intently; his expression didn't look like he was asking about a trivial household matter—it was as if he were waiting for her to decide something major. Ultimately, she considered his pride and said, "Changing the curtains is probably easier." He was overjoyed that she was willing to answer. "Then I’ll have people come and change them tomorrow. You shouldn't read; it’s bad for your eyes." He immediately added, "If you want to read, turn on the main light." Although he said this, his eyes couldn't hide a trace of expectation. She thought about how happy he had been when she had taken the initiative to speak to him during the day, and now he was being so cautious—he was clearly afraid of her overthinking it and was doing his utmost to be considerate. Her heart softened, and she said in a low voice, "I won't read, then."

After the Lantern Festival, official business gradually became heavy again. Lei Shao-gong arrived early; Murong Qingyi hadn't come downstairs yet, so he waited. He saw Susu walk in from the courtyard, followed by someone carrying cut branches to place in a vase. He stood up quickly to bid her good morning. Susu had always been very polite to him. She returned the greeting and asked, "Is there an urgent matter? I’ll have someone go call him." Lei Shao-gong said, "I just made a call; the Third Young Master will be down shortly." For the past half-month, they had been running back and forth between both places, which was extremely inconvenient, yet Murong Qingyi hadn't seemed to mind. Murong Qingyi came downstairs, saw Lei Shao-gong, and asked, "Have you been waiting a while? Wait a moment more, I’ll be right with you." He walked over, spoke a few words to Susu, and then headed out.

Lei Shao-gong noticed he was in an excellent mood and said, "Third Young Master, about Miss Wang—do you want me to arrange something? She hasn't been able to find you lately and keeps pestering me." Murong Qingyi laughed, "She’s pestering you? Why don't you do me a favor and accept her?" Lei Shao-gong laughed, "No thanks, I couldn't handle such an 'advantage'."

Murong Qingyi went to a meeting, and Lei Shao-gong went to the duty room to look through official documents. He hadn't been reading for long when Miss Wang called again. Lei Shao-gong got a headache the moment he heard her voice. He started by saying, "The Third Young Master is not here." Wang Qilin grew fierce, biting her lip slightly as she said, "He’s doing this on purpose to avoid me, isn't he?" Lei Shao-gong said, "He is busy with official business." Wang Qilin sneered, "Director Lei, there is no need to brush me off here. I will go and invite the Third Young Mistress to tea later." Lei Shao-gong had always been easy-going, but hearing her make such a threat, for some reason, he became angry. He said coldly, "I advise you not to entertain such thoughts. If you want to seek your own destruction, just go ahead and try."

Wang Qilin was stunned for a long while before whispering, "So it is true? They say outside that the two of them have patched things up." Lei Shao-gong said, "You are wrong about that too. They were never really estranged, so how can you say they've patched things up?”

Wang Qilin sneered, "Don't give me that bureaucratic talk. Who among us doesn't know that the Third Young Mistress has been stuck in her own cold palace for nearly two years? Why has the Third Young Master suddenly thought of her again recently? I’d like to see how long she can last."

After hanging up the phone, Lei Shaogong only wanted to curse. When he returned that evening, he said to Murong Qingyi, "Among all your girlfriends, this Miss Wang is the most difficult to deal with. You had better think of a way to end it with her sooner rather than later." Murong Qingyi said nonchalantly, "You go ahead and handle it."

When he returned, Susu had not yet slept. Seeing him enter, she stood up. He said, "There are no outsiders here, so let's forgo the formalities. You are dressed too thinly; do not sit by the window." Susu reached out and took his coat. For the past ten days or so, he had been very attentive to her expression; seeing her smile slightly, he felt extremely happy and asked, "What did you have for dinner?"

Susu apologized, "I'm sorry, I didn't think you would be back this late, so I’ve already eaten. I’ll tell the kitchen to make you something else." He asked, "What did you have for dinner?" She replied, "I had Yangzhou fried rice." He immediately said, "Then I shall have fried rice as well." Hearing him say this, she couldn't help but offer a faint smile, and looking at her, he began to smile too.

Mulan married Zhang Ming-shu, and when Susu received the invitation, she was delighted. The Zhang family was wealthy, and they threw a lavish wedding banquet at Mingyue Tower; it was truly bustling. The street for half a block around Mingyue Tower was filled with cars flowing like water and horses like dragons; it was as if guests had come from all over, and the city was crowded with dignitaries. Mrs. Zhang had a keen eye and recognized Susu’s car. She greeted her, beaming with joy, "I didn't expect the Third Young Mistress to do us such an honor." She personally accompanied her inside. Many of the female guests knew her, and they surrounded her like stars around the moon, whispering pleasantries. It took Susu a long time to escape to the inner room. She offered her congratulations and took Mulan’s hand, looking at her gold-and-emerald-embroidered bridal gown, the velvet flowers in her hair, and the tiny, fine diamonds on her hairpins that shone like stars under the lights. It was all so full of joyous spirit. She couldn't help but say, "I am truly happy for you." Mulan was also overjoyed and replied, "After all these years, I have finally reached an outcome."

Susu was naturally placed at the head table by the host. In such a lively setting, one could barely eat anything, so upon returning home, she had to call the kitchen to make her some noodles. Murong Qingyi had originally been reviewing case files, but he set them down and smiled at her, "You went out for a feast of abalone and shark fin, yet you want a bowl of plain noodle soup when you get back?" She said, "I’m not used to eating that kind of food. I noticed the bride didn't eat much either." He asked, "There must have been many guests, right?" She gave a soft "Mm," and then added, "Mulan introduced me to the bridesmaid, Miss Wang. That Miss Wang is actually quite amiable. Mulan and she are very close, and we’ve arranged to have coffee together soon."

He said, "It’s good to go out and play with friends occasionally, rather than staying cooped up at home all day." He suddenly remembered something and asked, "Miss Wang—which Wang family is she from?"

She said, "The second daughter of Minister Wang." His expression changed, though he quickly returned to normal and said, "As for that Fang Mulan, you should see less of her. We are related to the Huo family by marriage; avoid inviting any trouble later on." She was stunned for a moment and said, "Mulan and I have been friends for over a dozen years. The incident with Young Master Xu happened so long ago, I thought it wouldn't matter."

He said, "How can you be so naive? If others find out, they will only mock us again."

She said, "I cannot just abandon a friend for fear of gossip." He felt frustrated and said, "Regardless, I do not approve of you being with them. If you want to make friends, the women of the Huo, Mu, and Chen families are all very amiable, aren't they?"

She sighed softly, "They are only amiable to the 'Third Young Mistress,' not to me."

He said, "See, you are speaking strangely again. Aren't you the Third Young Mistress?" He paused, then added, "You know that among those old family friends, there is the most gossip. I just don't want you to get caught up in it inadvertently and be used by people with ulterior motives." Susu said, "I understand."

He had recently been promoted and was naturally busier than usual. One day, upon returning from a business trip, he first went to Shuangqiao to see his parents. When he returned home, Susu was eating. He said, "Don't stand up; there are no outsiders here." He turned to the servants and said, "Have the kitchen add a couple of dishes and bring me a pair of chopsticks." Seeing a small glass dish on the table containing drunken snails—the snails were as red as dates and shaped like pears, very tiny, looking like miniature pears—he recognized them as the specialty pear snails from Pingxin Sea and asked, "This is quite rare; where did it come from?"

Susu said, "Mulan and Mr. Zhang came back from their honeymoon in Pingxin Sea and brought a basket of these back for me to taste."

He picked up his chopsticks and tasted one, saying, "It’s very savory." Then he asked, "Did you change cooks? This doesn't taste like their usual style." Susu said, "Last time I heard Mother say you liked these, I was afraid the kitchen would make them too salty. So, I tried pickling these few myself. I wasn't sure how the flavor would turn out, and I thought since you weren't coming back until tomorrow, I’d try them myself tonight." Murong Qingyi’s face lit up, and he said, "So it was the Third Young Mistress who pickled them herself? I am truly flattered." Seeing that he was extremely happy, Susu smiled and said, "As long as you like them, it’s enough." The kitchen brought some porridge, and he asked casually, "Did you meet them outside, or did they come to the house?" Susu said, "I know you don't like strangers coming to the house, so I made arrangements to meet Mulan outside. I treated her and Mr. Zhang to a meal. They chose the place, a restaurant called Qianchun Tower; it cost one hundred and forty dollars."

Hearing this, he laughed, "That’s enough, that’s enough. I was just asking casually; you don't need to report every single detail." He thought for a moment and said, "I had forgotten; your monthly allowance is only five hundred dollars, which is likely not enough. I’ll tell them later to pay my salary directly to you starting this month."

Susu said, "I don't have many places to spend money; I can't even use up five hundred every month." He said, "Prices have been very high lately. Buying a single outfit probably costs over a hundred. That five hundred of yours will be gone after inviting friends for tea a few times." She said, "I can’t even finish wearing the clothes Mother has people make for me, and besides, I can charge most things to an account. You surely have more expenses than I do; there is no need to give me your entire salary." This made him laugh, "You silly girl, what is that salary of a few thousand worth? You don't need to worry about me. Even if you don't spend it all, you can just buy more things you like." Seeing her look slightly embarrassed, he changed the subject: "That Qianchun Tower sounds nice. I wonder how the food is?"

Susu said, "It’s a newly opened Yunnan restaurant. There are a few dishes that are quite unique; they have a kind of dried bow-fish that is delicious." Murong Qingyi felt a bit uncomfortable upon hearing this, but he remained smiling and asked, "How did you think to go eat Yunnan food?" Susu replied, "Miss Wang is from Yunnan; she recommended we go there to try it together." Upon hearing this, Murong Qingyi did not show anything on his face; he only said, "That Miss Wang—you should keep your distance from her.”

Susu felt a little strange and asked, "Why?"

He said, "If you don't understand, don't ask. In any case, just pay her no mind." Because he was intentionally vague, Susu thought for a moment and asked, "Is it because of the political situation?"

Murong Qingyi was precisely trying to lead her into such a misunderstanding, so he said, "Just don't ask." Hearing him say this, Susu assumed her guess was correct. Given Madame Murong’s frequent instructions on such matters, she knew it was improper to press further, so she simply kept it to herself.

A few days later, while out having dessert with Mulan, Mulan said, "Qilin says she wants to invite us to Beiyun to play. I’ve already agreed; what about you?" Susu shook her head, "I can't." Mulan asked, "Isn't the Third Young Master away from home? Why not go out and have some fun? How boring it must be to be at home alone."

Susu replied, "I’m used to it anyway." Mulan said, "Looking at you like this, aren't you afraid of getting sick from boredom? Though, your complexion has been quite good lately." Susu said, "Is that so? Perhaps it’s because I’ve been eating well lately, so I’ve gained a little weight." Mulan laughed, "Looking at you, you’d fly away if a gust of wind hit you, and you call that fat? I’m the one who’s actually gained weight." She suddenly thought of something, "The Grand Theater is performing 'The Nutcracker' the day after tomorrow. Let’s go see it. I hear the new dancers in the troupe are excellent." Hearing this, Susu was truly pleased, "That sounds good! Call me when the time comes, and we’ll go together."

When the day arrived, Mulan did indeed call to invite Susu. They met outside the theater, only to find that Wang Qilin had also been invited. Susu remembered Murong Qingyi's words, but since she was already there, it wouldn't do to leave, so she went inside with the two of them. Fortunately, watching ballet is different from watching a play; one cannot talk too much, so they simply watched the stage quietly. Both she and Mulan were connoisseurs and noticed that the newcomers were indeed dancing brilliantly. Susu was watching with intense focus when she suddenly heard Wang Qilin say softly, "I heard that the Third Young Mistress’s rendition of 'Butterfly Lovers' years ago drew praise even from the Madame." Before Susu could reply, Mulan had already laughed, "Susu is incredibly talented." Susu could only smile and say, "That was many years ago. How could I still dance now?" Mulan added, "My bones have long since stiffened too. I tried it last time, and I couldn't even lift my legs."

Susu was afraid that speaking too loudly would disturb others, so she stopped responding. Just as the fourth act was about to end, she suddenly saw several people in the box at the very end turn around, and one person even stood up to show respect. Mulan was curious and turned her head to look as well. She saw a few men walking down the corridor, all in military uniform. The man in the lead, tall and elegant, arriving with a flourish, was none other than Murong Qingyi. The patrons in the surrounding boxes were all either wealthy or noble and naturally recognized him. As he walked along, he could not help but stand up and exchange greetings with many. It just so happened that the fourth act ended, and Susu was clapping. When she turned her head and saw him walk in, she stood up in surprise, "Why are you here?"

Murong Qingyi smiled, "I went back and you weren't home. They said you had come here, so I came to pick you up." Wang Qilin’s heart was already in a state of turmoil. Murong Qingyi had come on a whim and never expected to run into her here; he hesitated slightly. Knowing that eyes were upon him and that there were countless people watching the scene unfold, he remained composed and offered a greeting: "Miss Wang, long time no see." He also nodded toward Mulan, "Good evening, Mrs. Zhang."

Wang Qilin smiled slightly, "The Third Young Master and Third Young Mistress are truly devoted. You came to pick her up yourself as soon as you were apart."

Susu was always shy and said in a low voice, "Miss Wang is making fun of me." Murong Qingyi said, "I haven't had dinner yet." Hearing him say this, Susu naturally responded, "Then let’s head back first." Murong Qingyi took her coat and handbag but casually handed them to an attendant. Susu said to the two of them, "I’m truly sorry, we must be leaving now." The two naturally offered polite remarks and rose to see them off.

Once in the car, Susu saw that Murong Qingyi’s expression was not very good, and she whispered, "I didn't know Mulan had invited her too. Please don't be angry." Murong Qingyi smiled, gently patted her hand, and said, "It’s nothing, I’m not angry." Lei Shaogong, however, said, "Third Young Master, if you’ll excuse me, I have some personal business and will take my leave." Murong Qingyi said, "Go ahead."

They had originally driven two cars, and now Murong Qingyi and his wife took one and left first. Lei Shaogong lit a cigarette. The night wind was cool, and he leaned against the car, watching the Grand Theater flooded with light, illuminating the massive posters outside. On the poster, the lead actress leaned over, the thin tulle of her dance skirt resembling a half-wilted hibiscus flower. Seen under the lights, it was quite moving. As he gazed at that poster, he couldn't help but lose himself in thought. Not far away was the street, and he could faintly hear the bustling noise of the city, yet as he listened, it felt as though it were very far away. He flicked his cigarette butt away and lit another one. He hadn't finished this cigarette when, sure enough, he saw Wang Qilin walking out of the theater alone. She glanced toward the street, and the streetlight clearly illuminated her face, which held a faint trace of joy. As she walked over, however, her smile gradually faded, and she asked, "Did he tell you to wait for me here?"

Lei Shaogong said, "Miss Wang, please get in the car first."

Wang Qilin got into the car and asked, "Does he have something to say? Speak." Lei Shaogong said, "Miss Wang, you are a smart person. Besides letting others watch us make a fool of ourselves, what good does making a scene like this do?" Wang Qilin smiled and said, "What did I do? I and your Third Young Mistress are quite compatible. We were just having a meal and watching a play; are you afraid I’m going to eat her?"

Lei Shaogong also smiled, "Everyone says you are smart, but I think you are being foolish this time. You know his temper; if he turns against you, it won't be to your benefit, Miss Wang." Wang Qilin’s smile remained as bright as a flower, "Director Lei, tell me the truth. Who has he taken a fancy to recently? I know he has never taken this Young Mistress seriously; I’ve seen enough of him this past year, and I never expected him to distance himself from me. Won't you let me die with a clear conscience?"

Lei Shaogong said, "As subordinates, how would we know about his personal affairs?" Wang Qilin glanced at him and let out a soft laugh, "See, Director Lei is using bureaucratic language again, aren't you? If you don't know about his affairs, then no one does." Lei Shaogong said, "If you put it that way, Miss Wang, there is nothing I can do. If you would give me some face, state any conditions you have, and I will report them back."

Wang Qilin said, "Don't be in such a hurry to report back. What kind of conditions could I have? Who do you take me for? I was merely curious for a moment and wanted to get a good look at the Third Young Mistress to see what kind of world-toppling beauty she is. Now that I’ve seen enough, since you aren't happy about me associating with her, I won't bother her again in the future. However, there are quite a few people who know about him and me, and I can't guarantee that others won't talk."

Lei Shaogong said, "Knowing when to advance and when to retreat—that is the mark of a smart person, Miss Wang."

Wang Qilin smiled beautifully and said, "Me, smart? I’m just a fool."

The next day, Lei Shaogong said to Murong Qingyi, "Judging by Miss Wang’s attitude, she only suspects that you have taken a fancy to someone else. She seems to be acting out of spite and doesn't look like she intends to give up. However, she should understand the implications, so she shouldn't act rashly." Murong Qingyi said, "Then just tell her that I have indeed taken a fancy to someone else recently, so she stops bothering me." Lei Shaogong laughed, "If you want me to tell such a lie, she has to be willing to believe it. She just said she wants to clarify things with you personally." Murong Qingyi said, "I have no time to see her. If she has anything to say, tell her to say it to you. I originally thought she was quite understanding; I didn't expect her to be so entangled now." Hearing the regret in his tone, Lei Shaogong comforted him, "Although Miss Wang is difficult, she is a person of standing; she won't create a scandal for others to see." He hesitated and added, "That Mrs. Zhang seems to be playing dumb. The Young Mistress is an honest person, and I’m afraid she might be the one to suffer."

Murong Qingyi said, "She just likes to talk about rumors and gossip. I doubt she has the nerve to say anything in front of Susu. Let her be."

Since he said so, when Lei Shaogong received another call from Wang Qilin, he simply said, "The Third Young Master really cannot spare the time. If you have anything to say, telling me is the same." Wang Qilin sighed, "I didn't expect him to be this heartless—refusing even to meet." She thought for a moment and said, "Since he is like this, so be it. However, I want him to do one thing for me." Seeing that she was willing to discuss conditions, Lei Shaogong was naturally pleased and said, "Just speak, and I will definitely relay it to him word for word." Wang Qilin said, "Regarding the Qiyu Mountain project, I want him to specifically designate a certain company to handle it." Lei Shaogong hesitated, "This is official business for the Planning Department. I don't think it would be convenient for him to intervene." Wang Qilin sneered, "If you can't make the decision for him, then go and ask him first. Honestly, my making this request is already going easy on him. He just has to say a word—is he not even willing to do that?" Lei Shaogong only said, "I will ask for his instructions and then come back to you with an answer.”

That evening, seeing that Murong Qingyi had a moment of leisure, she spoke to him about the matter. Sure enough, Murong Qingyi frowned, "She really is opening her mouth like a lion; this kind of intermediary hand-off is not a small sum." Lei Shaogong said, "I told her that you were in a difficult position; after all, it is no small matter, and it is not under your direct jurisdiction. If word gets out to others, it will only lead to more trouble." Murong Qingyi looked impatient, "Forget it, forget it. Just do as she asks; I will go and speak to them later. It will be a once-and-for-all solution, saving her from coming up with more tricks."

They were talking in the living room. Across the floor-to-ceiling windows, Lei Shaogong saw Susu approaching from the garden and fell silent. Murong Qingyi turned to see her and asked, "I see your skill has greatly improved recently. Are these flowers you are going to arrange?" Susu replied, "I am just following my mother’s instruction, merely imitating the experts."

Seeing her enter, Lei Shaogong immediately took his leave. Murong Qingyi looked at Susu, who was dressed in a pale green cloud-brocade cheongsam with very faint pearl-grey embroidery, and said, "The weather is getting hotter; actually, wearing Western-style clothing is cooler than a cheongsam." Susu said, "I have never been accustomed to wearing Western clothes at home; the skirts are so short." This made him laugh. She felt quite embarrassed herself and asked, "When will you be back from this trip?" Murong Qingyi said, "I’m not sure, probably two or three days." Seeing her holding the small silver scissors and lowering her head to slowly trim the excess leaves from the roses, he said, "Once I get through this busy spell, let’s go out and have some fun. We’ve been married for so many years, and I’ve never taken you away." She said, "It’s all right. You are so busy, and honestly, I am too lazy to move about." He said, "When I return, no matter what, I’ll have them arrange a few days for me, and I’ll take you to Changxing Sea. There is an official residence there; it is very convenient." He took the rose from Susu’s hand and tucked it into her collar for her, "At that time, it will just be the two of us, living quietly for a few days." Susu felt a sense of longing as she heard him say this. Watching him gaze at her intently, even though they had been husband and wife for years, she still found herself lowering her head unconsciously. The rose on her collar was fragrant and sweet, enough to make one swoon.

After he left, Susu was alone at home. That day, she went to the Shuangqiao official residence and had lunch with Madame Murong. It happened that Weiyi brought her child over, and Susu played with the baby in the courtyard. Seeing how lovingly she treated the child, Weiyi turned her face and whispered to Madame Murong, "Third Brother has finally come to his senses; it’s a pity for Third Sister-in-law after all these years." Madame Murong sighed softly, "There is still something missing, after all; if only there were a little child, it would be the icing on the cake. Your Third Brother will be thirty in two years; when your father was his age, he already had your eldest sister and your second brother." Weiyi seemed to recall something, glanced at Susu, and lowering her voice, said, "Mother, I heard a rumor outside; I don't know if it’s true?" Madame Murong knew this young daughter of hers never liked to gossip, so she felt slightly strange and asked, "If you have something to say, just say it. Does it have to do with your Third Brother?"

Weiyi whispered, "I heard people say that Wang Qilin and Third Brother have been getting very close this past year." Madame Murong asked, "Wang Qilin? Is that the second daughter of the Wang family, that girl who looks quite delicate?" Weiyi nodded, "Xicheng has run into them together twice. You know Third Brother’s temper; he doesn't hide things." Madame Murong laughed, "Young people are shallow; playing around outside is nothing. Your Third Brother has always known the difference between right and wrong; I think he has been quite proper lately." For some reason, Weiyi let out a long sigh. Hearing the frustration in her voice, Madame Murong asked, "You are stammering; what exactly are you trying to say?" Weiyi looked at Susu from afar again. She saw her holding the baby, one hand holding bread to feed the fish, drawing them to the surface to murmur and splash, making the child giggle. Susu was also smiling, using her free hand to tear up bread for the child, teaching him to scatter it into the pond. Weiyi whispered, "Mother, I heard that Miss Wang is pregnant."

Madame Murong felt her eyelids twitch slightly. With a stern expression, she asked, "Are you saying that the child is your Third Brother’s?" Weiyi said, "That is what people outside are saying, though I am half-skeptical. Who knows such things besides the two of them?" Madame Murong said, "The third one wouldn't be that foolish. Who did you hear this from?" Weiyi said, "By the time it reached my ears, it had already passed through many hands; I don't really believe it. But there is one more thing; I don't know if Mother knows about it?" After a pause, she continued, "Regarding the road reconstruction project at Qiyu Mountain, I heard that Third Brother stepped in and took it all on, contracting it entirely to one company. Coincidentally, this company is under the name of Wang Qilin’s uncle."

Madame Murong’s expression turned heavy, "If that’s the case, then there is some truth to it. How could the third one do such a thing? If your father finds out, he’ll have his head."

Weiyi said, "Third Brother has risen too quickly these past few years, and people outside say all sorts of things. But because he has always acted recklessly, he will eventually suffer for it."

Madame Murong thought for a moment and said, "When the third one returns, I will ask him." Gazing at Susu’s back, she added, "Don't tell your Third Sister-in-law, so as not to distress her." Weiyi pouted, "Mom, do you think I don't even know that much?"

Susu did not return until after dinner. Just as she entered the house, she received a call from Mulan, "I’ve been looking for you all day; you weren't home." Susu smiled apologetically, "I went to Shuangqiao today; is something the matter?" Mulan said, "Nothing in particular, just wanted to invite you to dinner." Susu said, "I am truly sorry, I have already eaten. Let me treat you another day." Mulan said, "I have something of the utmost importance to tell you. Come, I am waiting for you at Yixinji."

Susu hesitated, "It is so late; why don't I invite you for tea tomorrow?" Mulan said, "It is only a little past eight; the streets are very lively. Come out; the matter is truly very urgent. Hurry, I am waiting for you."

Hearing the urgency in her tone and thinking that it must truly be important, Susu had no choice but to take a car to Yixinji. Yixinji was a long-established Suzhou-style restaurant that specialized in catering to dignitaries and celebrities. From afar, the tea waiter at the restaurant saw the license plate and ran up to open the door for her, "The Third Young Mistress is truly an honored guest." Susu never liked such flattery and could only nod and smile. The waiter asked, "Is the Third Young Mistress here alone? Would you like a private room?" Susu said, "No, Mrs. Zhang is waiting for me here." The waiter laughed, "Mrs. Zhang is in the Sanxiao Pavilion; I will take you up."

Sanxiao Pavilion was an exquisite private room. Its distinction lay in the hanging portrait of a lady on the wall, which was an authentic work by Zhu Zhishan. The other scrolls and paintings were also all works by contemporary masters. Over the past few years, Susu’s experience had grown, and a single glance told her of their immense value. She saw Mulan sitting alone at the table, staring vacantly at a cup of tea, and smiled, "Mulan, what is so urgent that you had to call me out so hurriedly?"

When Mulan saw her, she slowly revealed a bitter smile. Susu quickly asked, "What’s wrong? Are you having a falling out with Mr. Zhang?" Mulan sighed, "I would rather be having a falling out with him." Susu sat down, and the waiter asked, "What will the Third Young Mistress have?" Susu said, "I have already eaten; why don't you ask Mrs. Zhang to order." She then smiled at Mulan, "Having arguments is the most normal thing in the world; don't be angry. This meal is on me. Eat a hearty meal, and I guarantee your mood will improve."

Mulan said to the waiter, "You may go; we will order in a moment." Watching him exit and close the door, she took Susu’s hand and said, "You fool, do you truly not know?"

Susu never imagined the conversation would turn to herself and asked in confusion, "Know what?"

Mulan was hesitant to speak, "Logically, I shouldn't tell you, but besides me, there is probably no one else who will say it to you—Susu, I have truly wronged you."

Susu became even more puzzled and forced a smile, "Look at you, you have me completely bewildered. You have never been like this; we have a dozen years of friendship, is there anything that cannot be said?" Mulan said, "When you hear this, do not be angry, and do not be sad." Susu gradually began to guess a thing or two, and instead, her heart felt strangely calm as she asked, "What have you heard?"

Mulan sighed again and said, "I met Wang Qilin last year because she is a relative of Ming-shu’s cousin. I, too, did not expect things to turn out this way."

Susu gave a soft "Mm," her tone detached, "I do not blame you, nor do I blame anyone else. No wonder he told me not to associate with Miss Wang; so that is the nature of the situation." Mulan said, "I think the Third Young Master was only trifling with her; I hear that he and Wang Qilin have already cut off all contact.”

Susu’s lips curled into a dazed, faint smile. Mulan said, "Don't be like this. After all, he was trying to protect you; otherwise, he wouldn't have told you not to associate with her."

Susu pulled herself together and said, "Let’s not talk about this anymore. Let’s order and eat; I’m actually quite hungry now." Mulan paused and said, "There is one more thing—I don't know if I should tell you."

Susu sighed softly and said, "If you have something to say, just say it." Mulan replied, "I only heard it from others—that Wang Qilin is pregnant." Susu’s face turned deathly pale, and her gaze was fixed straight onto the teacup in front of her, as if she were trying to see right through it. Mulan gently shook her shoulder, "Susu, don't scare me. This is only a rumor; we don't know if it’s true." Susu picked up the menu. Mulan noticed her hands were trembling slightly, but her face remained devoid of expression. Mulan urged, "If you want to cry, just let it all out." Susu slowly lifted her head, her voice light, "I won't cry. I will never cry again."

Mulan watched as she called the waiter in to order, looking as if nothing were the matter. When the food arrived, she only spooned the potherb soup into her bowl, one ladle after another. Even when it was filled to the brim and spilling over the edges, she did not stop. Mulan called out, "Susu." Only then did she notice, put down the spoon, and say, "This soup is truly salty; it makes one thirsty." Mulan said, "You don't look well. Let me take you home." She shook her head, "No need, the driver is waiting downstairs." Mulan had no choice but to stand up and see her downstairs. Watching her get into the car, she still smiled at Mulan, "Hurry home; it’s already so late."

The more calm and collected she appeared, the more Mulan felt that something was wrong. The next day, she called again, "Susu, are you alright?" Susu said, "I’m fine." It wasn't convenient to say much over the phone, so Mulan exchanged a few pleasantries and hung up. The moment Susu placed the receiver down, the phone rang again. It was Murong Qingyi, asking, "What are you doing at home? I’m returning today; wait for me for dinner, alright?" Susu gave a soft "Mm" and said, "Alright, I will wait for you." He said, "What’s wrong? You seem unhappy." She whispered, "I am not unhappy. I have always been happy." He finally felt that something was off and pressed, "Tell me the truth, what happened?" She said, "Nothing. I probably caught a cold while sleeping yesterday, so I have a bit of a headache."

In the afternoon, the summer heat intensified. She lay on the bed, her neck covered in sweat, feeling sticky and uncomfortable, wishing she could bathe again. Gradually, her mind grew hazy and her eyes weary; the book in her hand lowered slowly. In her drowsy state, someone suddenly pressed a hand gently against her forehead. Upon opening her eyes, the first thing she saw were the brilliant epaulets on his shoulders. He hadn't changed his clothes, likely coming straight upstairs after getting out of the car, his breathing uneven from haste. In such weather, his face was naturally covered in sweat. Seeing her eyes open, he smiled and asked, "Did I wake you? I was afraid you had a fever, seeing how red your face was."

She shook her head and said, "Go and change your clothes; it is so hot." He went to wash and change, but when he returned, she had already fallen back asleep, her brows slightly furrowed as if veiled in a faint mist. He leaned over unconsciously, as if wanting to kiss away the knot between her brows, but the moment his lips touched her forehead, she woke with a start. Instinctively, she recoiled, and a look of revulsion clearly flashed in her eyes. He paused, reaching out to take her hand. She remained motionless, allowing him to hold it, but she lowered her gaze. He asked, "What is the matter with you?" She simply shook her head. He asked, "What on earth happened?" She said simply, "Nothing." He grew irritable. She was right before his eyes, yet she had become distant—so distant that it made him restless and agitated. "Susu, you have something on your mind." She remained detached, saying, "No."

The weather was sweltering; the new cicadas outside the window were screaming at the top of their lungs. He struggled to restrain his temper, "Do not hide things from me. If something is the matter, speak clearly."

She remained silent, and he became faintly angry. "I rushed back early just because I was worried about you. You are always like this toward me—what exactly do you want me to do?"

What right did she have to demand anything? That he had thought of her again was already a supreme favor; why would she dare to desire anything else? The bleak, desolate smile on her lips finally angered him, "Do not be ungrateful!" She retreated, and he finally turned his face away, defeated and powerless. He had tried so hard, giving his all to be cautious and attentive, yet she was still afraid of him—even beginning to despise him. A few days ago, she had given him hope, but today, that hope was well and truly lost.

He stared at her. Her face was pale, as frail and weak as a blade of grass, yet this grass was rooted in his heart, representing a terrifying desolation. He suppressed his temper, fearing he would say something hurtful again, yet she remained silent. He clenched his fists in silence, his nails digging deeply into his palms. She was right before him, yet already so far away—as if an impassable chasm lay between them. Only she—only she could make him feel so powerless, without a plan, without a thought, left only with helplessness; even self-deception had become a foolish fantasy.

He went to Shuangqiao to see his parents and stayed for dinner with Madame Murong. After the meal, while drinking coffee in the lounge, Madame Murong waved the servants away and asked him with a stern expression, "What is the situation with that Wang Qilin?" He hadn't expected Madame Murong to bring up this person, and he paused before asking, "Why would Mother think to ask about this?" Madame Murong said, "The rumors outside are deafening—I think you have lost your senses. I heard she is carrying your child; is it true?" Murong Qingyi blurted out, "Impossible. I haven't even seen her all year." Madame Murong’s expression wavered slightly, but her tone remained severe, "Do not think you can gloss over this matter. Give me an honest answer. If you refuse, I will tell your father later and have him question you himself." Murong Qingyi said, "Mother, I would not be so reckless. I did associate with her for a while, but we broke up after the Lunar New Year. The child business must be her lying. If it were true, she would be at least six months along by now; how could she still be out and about?"

Only then did Madame Murong nod gently, "That is good. I thought as much—you would not be so careless. But the fact that others are spreading this so widely means they are pinning it on you, after all."

Murong Qingyi said angrily, "It is truly tiresome; I didn't expect her to be so wild." Madame Murong said, "In the end, it is because you were not cautious. You only learn your lesson after you’ve been burned. Susu ignores your past indiscretions, but if she were to hear such words, it would truly break her heart." Murong Qingyi remembered her expression and suddenly realized, "She likely has already heard—when I returned today, she was acting very strangely." Madame Murong said, "It is because of your repeated mistakes that she gives you such cold looks; it is only to be expected."

Guilt gnawed at him, and on the way home, he wavered over how to explain it. To his surprise, when he arrived home, Xinjie said, "The Young Mistress went out." He asked, "Where did she go?" Xinjie said, "Right after you left, the Young Mistress received a phone call and went out." Seeing that Susu’s car was still at home, he asked, "Who called? Why didn't the Young Mistress take the car?" Xinjie shook her head, "I don't know about that."

In summer, the sky usually stayed light for a long time. The night was heavy, and the silhouettes of the trees outside the window blurred, like ink soaked in water, thick and indistinct. He grew anxious, pacing back and forth in the living room. Lei Shaogong, intending to end his shift and go home, walked in and saw him in this state, feeling uneasy. He said, "Third Young Master, should we send someone out to look for her?" Remembering her demeanor earlier that day—the cold, powerless, and resolute look in her eyes—he was suddenly struck with terror, fearing she might have done something unthinkable. His heart fell into complete disarray. He hurriedly said, "Go quickly! Tell them all to go and find her!"

Lei Shaogong agreed and went out to make arrangements. Murong Qingyi was consumed by worry, but after pacing back and forth, he remembered something and said to Lei Shaogong, "Call Wang Qilin for me; I have something to ask her."

When Wang Qilin heard Murong Qingyi’s voice, she laughed like silver bells, "What made you think of me today?" Murong Qingyi did not want to converse with her any further, simply saying, "What are you blathering about outside?" Wang Qilin let out an "Oh?" and said, "I haven't said anything at all? Why the accusatory tone?" He sneered, "Don't play dumb. Even my mother has heard—you are pregnant? With whose child?" Wang Qilin spat lightly, her voice cloying and sweet, "You heartless man, how can you say such hurtful things? Who did you hear this from? Who is so malicious as to make up such rumors? If my family were to hear it, it would surely make the elders ill.”

Seeing her flatly deny it, he said coldly, "I have already done what you asked of me. We are finished; we owe each other nothing. You had best not be this tedious in the future, or you will certainly regret it." Wang Qilin laughed lightly, "No wonder they all say you are the most heartless. It is truly so." Unwilling to say more to her, he reached out and hung up the phone.

By the time it was past ten o'clock at night, he was growing anxious. He sat down to flip through official documents, but his mind was elsewhere. Fearing that something might have happened, Lei Shaogong remained behind instead of leaving. Occasionally, he looked up at the clock in the corner, but there was still no news from the servants who had been sent out to search for her. Murong Qingyi was deeply worried. With a "snap," he threw the document in his hand onto the desk and said, "I will go out and search for her myself." Before he finished speaking, the phone rang. Lei Shaogong hurriedly walked over to answer it. It was Mulan. Seemingly not recognizing his voice and assuming it was a regular servant, she said, "Please ask the Young Mistress to come to the phone." Hearing her say this, Lei Shaogong’s heart sank for some unknown reason, and he asked, "Is this Mrs. Zhang? Is the Third Young Mistress not with you?"

Mulan said, "I just got back. I heard someone from there called looking for me, so I’m returning the call. Who is—" Lei Shaogong said, "This is Lei Shaogong. Didn't the Third Young Mistress have an appointment with you today?" Mulan said, "I had dinner with her at Yunhuatai, and then she went back first. I went to see a play, so that is why I am only just now returning."

Murong Qingyi had been listening the whole time, and now he became even more worried. Fearing that some accident had occurred and losing his composure in his concern, he immediately said to Lei Shaogong, "Call Zhu Xunwen and tell him to send people to help." Lei Shaogong wanted to speak but stopped; knowing that Murong Qingyi would certainly refuse to listen to reason, he had no choice but to go and make the call.

Wang Qilin held the phone, hearing only the busy signal on the other end. Facing her was a floor-to-ceiling mirror, reflecting her figure in a resplendent rose-red cheongsam. She leaned lazily against a high stool; reflected in the glass, she looked like a flower, blooming so beautifully. The thin layer of rouge on her fair, powdery face did not waste this lovely hour. She replaced the receiver, yet she intentionally lingered for a moment. She offered a "titter" of a laugh at herself in the mirror, straightened her hairpins in a leisurely manner, and then walked through the flower hall into the inner room. She gave Susu a bright, charming smile, "My deepest apologies, the call took so long."

Susu said indifferently, "It is so late now. If Miss Wang has no other business, I shall take my leave." Wang Qilin pursed her lips and smiled, "It was my oversight, keeping you sitting for so long while I just babbled on. I will have them send you back in a car." Susu said, "That won't be necessary." Wang Qilin said, "Today, at least, I have clarified things before you. My relationship with the Third Young Master is truly nothing more than that of ordinary friends. The rumors outside are truly laughable. It is good that you don't take them to heart. However, as the saying goes, 'a thousand mouths can melt gold, and accumulated slander can destroy a person.' I just felt I could not defend myself against so many accusations. It was rare to run into you today, and being able to explain in person makes me feel much better."

Susu said, "Miss Wang need not be so polite." She had never been one for conversation, and her tone remained detached. Wang Qilin personally saw her out and insisted repeatedly on having her driver take her home. Susu said, "I will take a rickshaw back myself. Miss Wang need not worry." Wang Qilin smiled and had no choice but to call someone to hail a rickshaw for her.

Susu took the rickshaw back; it was deep into the night, and the streets were quiet. As the vehicle traveled through the cool wind, she stared blankly ahead. Just moments ago, at the Wang residence, behind the sandalwood and jade screen, she had vaguely heard that slightly raised voice: "You heartless thing." The tone was soft and tender, like flowers that understand speech, like jade generating fragrance. The person on the other end of the line must have surely felt their heart stir—the shocking pain of sinking into memory, once unearthed, proved to be just as heart-wrenching and gut-wrenching as before. So, she and she had spoken before, in a past so distant. Today, it was merely tearing open an old wound and sprinkling salt upon it.

In the end, it was she who had been deceiving herself. His life was filled with a riot of colors, and she was merely a detail scattered among them. His occasional attention and pity had caused her to give birth to vain hopes without reason. Because she bore the title, she had been wasted, and the woman had come to her face only to make things appear worse than they were. There was no greater mockery than this: the phone call had been made, full of flirtatious words and laughter, a scene of romantic intrigue, without ever thinking that she had been standing just steps away.

She said to the rickshaw puller, "Please stop up ahead." The puller looked back, startled, "We aren't there yet." She did not speak, handing over a five-yuan note. The puller paused and stopped the rickshaw, "I can't change this."

"Keep the change." Looking at the unconcealable joy on the man’s face, she felt only endless, boundless sorrow within her heart... To others, money, no matter the amount, can always bring happiness. It was so easy; five dollars could buy a smile, yet for her, a smile had become an unreachable, unattainable dream.

The shop was about to close. She ordered a bowl of taro and ate it slowly. The owner walked back and forth, tidying chairs and tables, sweeping and dusting. The owner’s wife was at the stove washing dishes, muttering to her husband as she scrubbed: "Look at you! You sweep the floor like you’re drawing magic charms. I must have owed you in a past life!" She wiped her hands on her apron, walked over, and snatched the broom to sweep it herself. The husband chuckled, scratched his head, and went back to washing dishes. A husband and wife sharing rice and firewood—such ordinary happiness in every word and deed; having let it slip through her fingers, it was something she could never attain.

She put down her spoon and stared blankly into space. In a daze, she looked up and found the person standing before her, finally revealing his surprise, "Mr. Zhang."

Zhang Mingshu forced a smile. After a moment, he called out, "Miss Ren."

He still used the old form of address. A miserable, bitter smile appeared on Susu’s lips—in this world, there was still someone who remembered that she was Ren Susu, and not the "Third Young Mistress." She asked, "It’s so late; why are you here?"

Zhang Mingshu said, "I was on my way home and passed by the gate of the Wang residence, and I happened to see you get into the rickshaw." He had merely been worried, thinking he would follow her secretly to ensure she got home safely, so he had told his driver to follow from a distance. Who would have thought she would get off halfway? He had followed her into the shop involuntarily, as if bewitched, unable to take his eyes off her any longer.

Susu sighed softly and said, "I am fine. You should leave." He had no choice but to answer with a grunt, and with his head lowered, he slowly walked out.

The bowl of taro had turned cold, and after eating it, it felt like a heavy stone pressing upon her stomach. She stood on the street like a sleepwalker. Pedestrians were sparse; occasionally, the lights of a passing car tore through the pitch-black darkness. The rickshaw’s bell tinkled, and the puller asked, "Do you need a ride, Miss?"

She remained dazed. As she sat in the vehicle, she heard the puller ask, "Where to?"

Where to? Although the world was so vast, where was she to go? The so-called "home" was merely an exquisite cage, locking away her life. Suddenly, within her dull pain, a courage to struggle was born—she did not want to return to that house. Even if she could avoid it for a moment, that would be good. Even if she could run away for a fleeting instant, that would be good.

It was a very, very small inn. The blue cotton quilt made her think of her earliest childhood, back when her parents were both alive and she was a child with a home. Her mother was busy working and couldn't look after her, so she would just place her on the bed to play. She was a very quiet child; she could sit for half a day just looking at the quilt. When her mother occasionally looked back and saw her, she would kiss her forehead and praise her as "good." Just that one word allowed her to sit quietly for another half-day. Her mother’s warm, soft lips seemed to still linger on her forehead, yet the time, flowing like water, washed past, just like a dream. She remembered when she first joined the ballet troupe, Mulan had been so full of confidence: "I want to be a huge, huge star." She had asked, "What about you?" Back then, she had only replied: "I want to have a home."

With fine clothes, jade-like food, and the admiration of the masses, when she awoke in the dead of night, the moonlight was like water, always shimmering like a mirage. Even when he was occasionally by her side, he was just as illusory and unreal. Now, even that unreality had vanished into ashes, becoming a broken dream. Her wish for her entire life had only been for the most ordinary, common happiness. The three or five short years since she had known him already felt like a lifetime—a lifetime already destined to be lonely and desolate.

The sky outside the window faded to a lotus-blue, then turned to a dove-gray, and slowly, a thin line of white appeared on the horizon. Although the night had been so dark, the sky had finally brightened; yet she would forever remain sunken in an abyss of darkness, never able to reach the dawn.

She lingered until near noon before leaving the room. The moment she opened the door, Zhang Mingshu, who was outside in the corridor, suddenly stepped back two paces. His expression was one of both relief and trepidation. Seeing her look at him, he couldn't help but turn his face away. She gradually understood: he had been too worried last night and had followed her all the way, actually keeping watch here for the entire night.

He was so infatuated... and what was Mulan to make of this? She gripped the door frame and lowered her head, feeling powerless. He finally spoke: "I... the driver is outside. I will have him send you back."

Her feet felt light and airy, as if stepping on clouds. Her voice was equally exhausted, "I will return on my own." She walked outward, her steps uneven, but just as she reached the passageway, she tripped over the threshold. He rushed forward, "Be careful.”

Dizzy and disoriented, she instinctively grabbed his arm, and in her daze, she felt as if she were looking at a familiar face. Those eyes were the demon that haunted her in this life, a shackle from which she could never escape.

"Ren Susu!"

Her body trembled as she lifted her head, only to see Lei Shaogong rush forward, crying, "Third Young Master!" As he tried to grab his arm, Murong Qingyi shook him off. Susu felt her body grow light as he yanked her toward him. His gaze was terrifying—"Smack!" A palm struck her across the face.

Zhang Mingshu demanded angrily, "Why are you hitting her?"

The world spun before her eyes; she felt his arm gripping her so tightly that it seemed he wanted to crush the life out of her. She could only say, "This has nothing to do with him."

A night of worry and fear, a night of aimless loss, a night of wild conjectures, a night of frantic searching—his eyes seemed ready to breathe fire, yet the only thing she could say was to excuse that man!

He cared for her—cared so deeply that he had nearly gone mad during this night of agony—yet this was all he heard. She was so fragile and slight, like a wandering soul, a soul he could never capture. He gasped for air, forcing her to meet his gaze, and yet she met it without fear. In the past, she had always lowered her head before him; that she had such courage now was only for the sake of someone else.

Lei Shaogong’s face was filled with anxiety, "Third Young Master, let go of the Young Mistress; she cannot breathe." He threw her off violently. She stumbled, unable to stand steady, and Zhang Mingshu could not help but reach out to support her, only to be shoved away by Murong Qingyi with great force, "You are not allowed to touch her."

Almost at the same time, she pushed his arm away, "Don't you touch me."

This sentence was like the sharpest blade, cleaving into his heart. She held her face up, stubborn and obstinate, and in her eyes, there was clearly nothing but disgust. She did not love him; ultimately, she did not love him. It was plain, it was clear, and finally, it had been said aloud. Relying on his power, he had kept her all these years, but in the end, he had failed to win even a fraction of her heart.

He had lost utterly before her, unable to turn the tide. All these years, all these years—she had become a pain deep in his bone marrow. Every spark of hope had only been exchanged for an even greater disappointment, until today... it had finally turned into despair. Despair grew from the depths of his heart. This one sentence of hers had sentenced him to death; the lingering shred of hope and unwillingness he had cherished were finally and completely erased by her. Like a drowning man at his deathbed, he squeezed a sentence out through his teeth, "I won't touch you! I will never touch you again for as long as I live!”